Bella's Lullaby is a quite a soothing song afterall (the orchestra one instead of just the piano)... At least it manages to calm me down after a wave of emotion. Well, ok Wei Liang's crazy e-mail contributed as well, funny la this guy :D

So yeah, wave of emotion...

No idea why my mum is so lovely in her smses to me when I'm at hostel. Sometimes her msgs remind me of boyfriends messaging girlfriends ~ sweet dreams, sweetheart, semoga ceria ~ you get what I mean.... Probably she misses me too much. Then when I'm at home, aiyoh I always feel like I'd done something wrong. In fact, I don't think I did anything wrong. I always feel interrogated and nagged at.

Like this morning, I told my mum I'm going masjid at 9am for usrah, THEN she tell me there's a wedding invitation. My distant aunt is getting married. Normally, if a wedding invitation falls on a Sunday, and especially if the wedding is not in Tampines, I won't go cos it's too rushing for me to Zohor and rush to madrasah. I don't see why I can't be excused today...

And I dislike people talking to me with arms folded.

Plus my dad is not helping... I don't have a curfew, but I kinda set my own curfews in the sense that if I say I'll be back by 7, I need to be back by 7. This never happened before I started staying in hostel... On thursday I went to NIE with Jamie. My plan was to reach home in time to do my asar prayers before it's time for maghrib. But I was doubtful I could, so I did tell my mum that I may not reach home then. It happened that Jamie wanted to see my hostel, so it took time, and so I prayed asar at my hostel. Otherwise I'd miss my Asar. I reached home around Maghrib and my dad asked in an authoritative tone (though sometimes he likes to 'joke') of why I came back late...

:( This is why I'm feeling rebellious (of which Sylvia says, "Hermione!" haha). Perhaps Twilight is not helping in this aspect, cos it puts back the 'teenager blood' in me when I should be matured and rational like a 20-year-old should be (I can't believe this! Time flies so fast!)

As much as I want to fill my holidays with beneficial activities back-to-back (like attending a 7hr meeting followed by CPR yesterday and how I wish I can attend Fatayaats usrah in the morning, tadarrus then madrasah after zohor followed by TMSN usrah with Dr Bakri after that, which I can't), I gotta sacrifice much. I don't mind spending time with my family if it means having a fun time. But apparently my family's definition of family time is sitting at home, doing your own stuff, of which I'd end up doing something Twilight-ish, which I have to admit is a waste of time and brain cells.

I enjoyed yesterday in the sense that I was reminded time and again of Allah and of our purpose on earth... Of course, with Raudah and her camera, and the rest of the girls, there's surely a mention of Twilight... But at least I can rein myself infront of them. Most of them only have critics for it anyway.

My principle: if you can't beat them, don't join them, but just keep quiet, smile and ignore them haha.

That's what I did anyway for most part of the Twilight discussion, the review of CPR, and the singings in Mohksin's car. Smile... and ignore ;p