La Tahzan La Tahzan La tahzan

Life is a university for us. Let's strive for all-round success. Hidup ini tarbiyah untuk kita. Ayuh usaha untuk kejayaan dunia dan akhirat.

Mmbbekkk... Mmbbekkk...  

Sunday, December 31, 2006

Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha! Allahu Akhbar!

What do you feel when you hear the takbir this morning? Maybe Aidiladha doesn't mean as much as Aidilfitri to you... For me, it's like I don't feel Aidiladha approaching 'cause we don't have to fast for a month before the festival. But helping out at Ghufran yesterday for Akikah as well as hearing the takbir early in the morning (my house isn't that far from Ghufran so you can hear the takbir) put me into the mood.

Yesterday, I went to Ghufran for briefing in the morning. Seriously, we need to do away with 'janji Melayu'. Instead of subjecting to it, why not change our attitude? Oh well... Anyway, I was there only for the briefing initially but decided to stay and help out for the akikah till 6/7pm. I was assigned to Finance for today but since there was no money to sort yesterday, I took the task at Information Counter with Ewanny. When Ewanny went of to walk around, I ended up playing Ayan's gameboy lol. When they said I could leave the post, I went to have my lunch with Nadirah before helping out (and then getting stuck) in the pantry making drinks and ice. I was stuck with Huda there cos we dirtied our feet and ended up being friends. Heheh, I make friends quite easily afterall eh? But I'm always the listening party :) At last, at about 5, we gave up chatting in the pantry, we washed our feet in the sink (so unladylike hahas) and made our way to the multi-purpose hall. It turned out practically everyone was already gathered there for debriefing! Let's skip this part shall we? Just wanna mention that a kambeng tried to run away but I think the kambeng thought over its decision after seeing Obek lol.


Today, I helped out at Ghufran again from 9-12. Wish I could help the whole day today but I had to go my grandma and grandaunt's house after Zohor so I had to leave at noon. Met up with Zee and Huda at 8.15am and made our way to Ghufran by feet. Btw, the t-shirt they gave, size M, was super big that I had to wear another shirt inside. The tail of the shirt reach my thighs, nearly my knees hor. Like nightgown, someone mentioned lol. I wasn't the only one with a t-shirt too big anyway... Anyway, when we reached Ghufran we met up with other Fatayaats and had to stay on the pathway leading to Ghufran 'cause the mosque was so full of jemaah lah. At about 9 then we managed to enter. As I mentioned earlier, I was assigned to Finance with Naza, my Titisan friend (hope she'd be a Fityan member too!) but since the money not ready or something like that, we ended up doing signage. Carefree... As compared to the other tasks heheheh. But I still had to go in and out of the mosque to place the signs/maps. After breakfast of epok-epok then we started our actual task. Sis Nurain also joined us since she wasn't specifically assigned to any task. Finace, what do we do? Sort out the donation money. We don't have to count 'cause they have a machine for that, but we had to sort out the money to coins, $2, $5, $10 and $50 (there were at least 3... May Allah bless them!). It wasn't only that, we had to sort out to old money, new paper money and new plastic money as well. Quite ok lah the task, except that it's really nerve-disturbing that just as you are about to finish sorting out, the Sis added more money to our basket! Nevermind lah, alhamdulillah many people actually donated right? It wasn't a totally boring job 'cause my companions were really entertaining. We joked and discussed and just talked lah. In short, had fun with Naza and Nurain lah! At about 1o plus, our task ended and after putting away the donation boxes, we went out to look at kambing hehe. Kambing so cute! So kesian... So I couldn't eat the rendang daging at my grandma's house...

Wah I write so long already... People say (you can read my testimonials and see that since last time one) I'm quiet but when I talk, they always groan 'cause I actually have a lot to say. Hopefully they're not crap! But Ili was like, "Fi jgn tido lah dgr Marliyana ckp. (Fi don't sleep, listen to Marliyana talk.)" Ish, do I bore people that bad??

Eh k lah, my dad wanna use the comp. He kept singing and singing aka bored with tv... Till next time then! Insyallah I'll be talking about the lessons I learn from KRC4 :D

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More Pics  

Saturday, December 30, 2006


Before leaving Nur Lembah Lenggong... *Sniff* Teman Betapa Pilunya Hati Menghadapi Perpisahan Ini.


Fatayaats in girls' dorm 'Mahsuri Lodge' before leaving the room for the last time.


Gambar dah cantik2, cept aku takde. Bukan takde, tapi terjatoh kat blakang Atikah/Nazihah. Sampai lebam my kaki!


'Mahsuri Lodge' aka the girls' dorm. Nice colour rite? Like my multiply site hehe.


Seri Demak aka the surau. Allahu Akhbar!


Seri Embun aka the dining area. You can see Cikgu Fauzan, Cikgu Roy & Cikgu Norsyam here as well.


Lingering behind after our last lunch here...

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Some KRC4 Pics  

Friday, December 29, 2006

In memory of the great time we had at Nur Lembah Lenggong, I shall post some pics of KRC4. A picture speaks a thousand words... And in my opinion, so does a song. So pardon me for the lyrics & pics bombard ya :P Well, here goes!


Participants in front of Ghufran at like 4am in the morning when we reached Sg.


Sunset. Taken during the bus ride back to Sg.


Sunset between 2 gunungs.


Kelapa sawit "botak". Look at the clouds!


Holding up kain belonging to one of the guys to stop the leak.


Fatayaats with Ustaz2 in front of Sungai Perak


That's the design for KRC4 shirt.

Hmm... I dunno why I can't add more pics, so I shall continue another day. Look out for pictures of Nur Lembah Lenggong: the girls' dorm, the dining area, the surau...

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Marliyana... Who are you?  

A veil hangs over your face
A string ties your hands together
Your eyes reveal nothing
Your mouth remain sealed

You confuse people around you
Cos you are confused yourself
You let people wonder who you are
Cos you wonder about it as well

A locked gate surrounds all around you
The key to it locked in your heart
You wish to break down this barrier
Yet you can't reach the key cos your hands are tied

When will you spread your wings and fly
Free yourself from the enclosure you'd created
It is time, after waiting for so long
Take the opportunity and fly free...

- By me...

I dunno how to explain what I'd written. Wanna say it's crap... there's some truth in it though. For example, the title itself... I do keep asking myself who am I. I dunno if it's important to know the answer but like, when you're 17 you expect yourself to know who you are and what you want.

I only know one thing. I'm a servant of Allah the Almighty and I want to be in His heaven at the end of time. But in life? What do I wanna achieve? What do I wanna be when I grow up? Grow up is not far away. And I myself realise, as much as I'm the same with different people, I am different in some ways. That's why I dunno how to react when two different groups of my friends come together.

Anyway, while looking for the song 'Teman Sejati', I came across other songs by Brothers and I think 'Satu Perjuangan' is a very meaningful song...

Syukur Pada Yang Esa
Rahmat PemberianNya
Persaudaraan, Keharmonian

Jalinkan Kasih Sayang
Hulurkanlah Bantuan
Kepada Yang Memerlukannya

Mari Kita Bina Satu Ummah Majujaya
Mula Diri, Keluarga, Sahabat
Masyarakat Dan Negara

Dengan Satu Perjuangan
Satu Arah Tujuan
Di Bawah Rahmat Yang Esa

Kita Melangkah Seiringan
Satu Perjuangan

Rintangan Pasti Melanda
Jangan Undur Walau Selangkah
Teruskan Perjuangan
Hingga Ke Akhirnya
Andai Kau Gugur
Andai Kau Syahid
Kau DiredhaiNya

Lyric from liriklagu and you can hear the song from this guy's multiply site. You can find the song 'Teman Sejati' and 'Doa Perpisahan' there as well.

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Teman Sejati oleh Brothers  

To all KRC4 participants, this song goes out to all of you. Wish I can attach the song to here but I don't know how hehe. Hope lyrics are fine...

Selama ini
Kumencai-cari
Teman yang sejati
Buat menemani
Perjuangan suci

Bersyukur kini
PadaMu Illahi
Teman yang dicari
Selama ini
Telah kutemui

Dengannya di sisi
Perjuangan ini
Senang diharungi
Bertambah murni
Kasih Illahi
KepadaMu Allah
Kupanjatkan doa
Agar berkekalan
Kasih sayang kita

Kepadamu teman
Ku pohon sokongan
Pengorbanan dan pengertian
Telah kuungkapkan
Segala-galanya...

Selama ini
Kumencai-cari
Teman yang sejati
Buat menemani
Perjuangan suci

Bersyukur kini
PadaMu Illahi
Teman yang dicari
Selama ini
Telah kutemui

Dengannya di sisi
Perjuangan ini
Senang diharungi
Bertambah murni
Kasih Illahi

KepadaMu Allah
Kupohon restu
Agar kita kekal bersatu
Kepadamu teman
Teruskan perjuangan
Pengorbanan dan kesetiaan
Telah kuungkapkan
Segala-galanya
Itulah tandanya
Kejujuran kita

Kumencai-cari
Teman yang sejati
Buat menemani
Perjuangan suci

Remember, we sang this song while holding onto each other in front of Sungai Perak on the last night, before our night trek, during Persantren Lenggong's performance? Miss you guys loads. I'm glad there's memories to hold on to. Wish you guys all the best and may Allah bless our friendship and guide us to Him. :D

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Bagai Sakti  

Bagai Sakti
Lagu: M. Nasir
Penyanyi: Siti Nurhaliza (S) & M. Nasir (M)

S: Cinta datang, tanpa diundang, seumur masa tercipta

M: Dia datang bagai sakti, bagai menyaksi mekar, kembang pagi
S: Cinta datang, dengan senyuman, panasnya membakar mentari

S&M: Wajah yang tergambar, tak akan terpudar
S: Dari hati insan yang fana ini
S&M: Fana ini...

M: Tak mungkin mentari, akan terus sembunyi
S: Tiada sempadan, tak bisa ku lewati

S&M: Jika ini hakikatnya, aku serahkan jiwa dan ragaku
S: Menantimu walau sengsara
S&M: Jika ini ketentuan-Nya

S&M: Jika ini hakikatnya, aku serahkan jiwa dan raga,
Jika ini ketentuan-Nya,
kau 'kan jadi milikku... jua

Taken from http://mobiler.blogdrive.com/archive/8.html

Tadi petang terdengar lagu ni kat radio, teringatkan cerita Puteri Gunung Ledang yang sungguh klasik. Menyesal tak tengok musikal PGL...:( Lagu ni sendiri bagai sakti yang menusuk dan mengusik jiwa dan raga. Ia membandingkan cinta dengan mentari. Metaphorical (Wow, the last time I used this word was in Sec 4)... Memang kenalah dengan cerita PGL.

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KRC4- cont  

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Aku nak blog pasal KRC!!! I don't care if it's 1am in the morning and I've still not started on my OTCM and CSAS project to be discussed tmr. I just wanna blog! It's like so... emotional seh... I went to Titisan just now and like so many things mentioned there reminded me of KRC. Cakap Faci, aku ingat Cikgu Fauzan. Nyanyi lagu teman sejati ingat persembahan Persantren Lenggong. Camne ni?? I miss the KRC peeps so so badly seh...

KRC4: The first KRC I attend. Initially I was contemplating whether to go GL camp or KRC, but since I wasn't accepted as GL, I decided to join KRC. And am I glad to have been a part of KRC4! It's such a memorable, wonderful, enjoyable learning experience. Playing 'Secret Admirer', playing war game "Move up!", "Fire!", "Take cover!", doing superman stunt for flying fox, building our own raft from bamboo and buoy, paddling the raft with a bottle, swimming 'under' the raft, peeling potatoes with fingernails, cutting potatoes with rocks, getting sharp thorns into my sole, performing 'boria' in front of everyone, singing 'teman sejati' with friends, going night trekking, being left alone in the forest, sleeping late night after night, bathing under freezing cold water, crying my eyes out, not having any appetite to eat, hugging friends, giving away and receiving presents and... many more.

KRC is like my TMS Sec 3 Resilience Camp except that it's more disciplined and fruitful. I really enjoyed myself and wish I can repeat the whole thing again!!! Sometimes I just sit down and flood myself in the memories, I feel myself flying through space and time and being plunged back at Nur Lembah Lenggong, with my friends whom I've considered family.

Persantren Lenggong... I especially cannot forget you guys. From not knowing each other to becoming one strong and united winning team. *waves flag* As Irsyad said, there's the mother, the brother, the sister... lol. We WERE one family away from our family.

I feel like crying... But somehow my tears seem to have dried up from the last day at Nur Lembah Lenggong when I cried till my eyes go soooo red and puffy.

I have loads more to say, to go into detail of each of the activities, especially water rafting and night trekking which for both, as scared as I was I enjoyed them the most.

I wanna put up the 'Teman Sejati' song here.

I can't wait for Sunday to meet PL and the other KRC members.

I'm so sorry to write in bits and pieces.

I lost four kilos during the camp btw.

P.S. I cooked rice today and it turned out well! And Ili picked me as Public Relations... Not under study... As of 9pm yesterday, I AM the PR! *shrugs*

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KRC4 - A meaningful & memorable experience  

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Alhamdulillah... Praise to Allah for safely sending us to and bringing us back from Nur Lembah Lenggong, Grik, Perak, Malaysia where the KRC4 and activities were held. I enjoyed the camp very much. Not only that, I also learnt many things that helps me become a better Muslim.

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Fityan Super-Late Hari Raya Gathering  

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Hmm... Term tests coming and I have a lot of responsibilities right now, so I apologize for the lack of updates. I'll just do what I can kk? And for now, I only have time to upload two pics:

The BBBIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGG Fityan Family!

Fatayaats... Fatayaats... Macam tak paham2 lagi... Kekkekeh

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Finally finally finally!  

Sunday, November 26, 2006

First and foremost, FINALLY I get to blog! Lol. =D
I'd been wanting to blog for the past few days but there's always something which hindered me. Oh well. Now that I'm here, let me get down to all the 'finallys'.

Finally, I went for the GL interview. It was more enjoyable than scary, as I thought it'd be hehe. Went for it on Friday after HPI lecture with Ad, Anil and Heider. A really funny combination. Even Terence, our interviewer thinks so haha. What not? I'm from Beenox, Ad's from Spydra, Anil's from Antor and Heider's from Mantiz and we're all from the same class! And when you put the four of us together... (Wiil be continued another time)

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3rd week of 2nd sem  

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Finally it's Saturday! I'd been waiting for this day the whole week! If you were me, with so many responsibilities at hand, you would be too. In summary, the following was what went on the past week.

Monday- (supposedly full-dress) rehearsal for MAG Perjumpaan Hari Raya 06 afer school
Tuesday- (supposedly full-dress) rehearsal for MAG Perjumpaan Hari Raya 06 after school
Wednesday- had one class in the morning then went to Liang Court Kinokuniya with Ad and then had MAG Perjumpaan Hari Raya 06 at night
Thursday- was late for Socio class(still wondering if I'm gonna be given my first ever warning letter) and then had OTCM open-book MCQ quiz (of which initially I thought it's a closed-book short ans quiz)
Friday- slept at 3am the day before trying to finish lab report due Friday at 1600hrs

Whoever got the idea of making me the assistant director for the Titisan drama????? I seriously had no idea how to go about doing my job seh... I just gave my best shot at it and screwed up (thus getting stressed up over it) a few times. It came out rather well on Wednesday though I thought it could have been better if there'd been more combined scenes rehearsal and a technical run. Oh well, it's over and done with and all I can say is: "Good job Titisan!" But a note of reminder to all: "Memorise your lines as soon as you get the script the next time you have a role!" Hmm... will post some pics later. As is very well known, Titisan members are cam whores. :) we have a lot of pics taken after the event. Even though there were only two people supposedly having their pics taken, by the time the cam button is clicked, there'd be ten of us in there haha!

Oh yah, forgot about the trip to Liang Court Kinokuniya... Went there with Ad on Wednesday straight after Maths tutorial in the morning to look for this thing 'Ukiyoe' for Ad's show and tell presentation in Japanese class. Looking it up, she found that Ukiyoe is a wooden printing block. The description is very vague, but in my mind I was picturing this signature block Sylvia uses to sign letters. Haha, after asking Sylvia where she bought it (she mentioned she bought it at $1 from the Bargain Alley), Ad and I was on our way there. The thing is, we are not sure if 'ukiyoe' is really what I think it is. But if it's $1, why not just buy it? Even if it's not the thing we're looking for, at least it serves as a memorial for our first outing together (besides the one with the class lar). But when we reached there, we couldn't find what we were looking for in the Bargain Alley... We walked around and instead found it below some showcases of Japanese dolls in kimonos. Well... The smallest one costs $6+ so we decided not to buy it. Instead, I went around looking at some books and letter sets. Ad went around with a really soft cuddly bear she found in the shop haha. In the end I ended up buying a letter set and a really nice notepad while Ad bought nothing lol. By the way, we found this useful Japanese book for beginners going at $2 and about 8-10 Danielle Steel books going at $3 each. Sheesh! Wish I'd brought more money!!! Val, wanna go there together some day?

Speaking of Val, we were just chatting on MSN about HZGG. Ahhhh!!!! I wanna watch the dvds! I still haven't returned Ya Zhi's HZGG2 dvd set by the way hehe. I haven't finish watching cos I got bored halfway when I don't understand what they're talking about. There's no English subtitles you see... As for HZGG1, eventhough Sylvia lent me the dvd set which also didn't have English subtitles, at least there's more actions than speech and so I enjoyed it afterall. Wish Channel 8 or Channel U would air HZGG on tv. I don't care which series, I just wanna watch HZGG with English subtitles!!! Lolx.

Haiz... I'll be having quizzes for Basic Microbiology (BMIc), Cell Biology and Human Physiology and Immunology (HPI) next week. On top of that there's gonna be HPI tutorial quiz as well (BMic and Cell Bio had tutorial pop quiz this week, sheesh!). In the following week, there's gonna be Maths quiz. On top top top of all this,I have two Socio online quizzes waiting for me to start doing. Hmm...

Guess I'd better go start studying now. Tonight there's gonna be Perjumpaan Hari Raya organised by Tampines MAEC and I'd be going. So yeah, tataz for now!

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Kiasu  

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Had sociology class earlier and one of the topics dicussed was 'kiasu-ism' in Singapore. Then after school, I boarded a very full bus and ended up having to stand on the stairs. At the next stop, the bus had to stop 'casue someone wanted to alight. There were people at the bus stop wanting to board the bus and so the driver asked the commuters to move to the rear (not in a very polite manner I might add, not the language but the tone) and while the people were moving in slowly (it was a very very full bus but then I saw at least four empty seats which were clean and okay to sit on yet no one sat), the driver opened the door for the people on the bus stop. I don't mind that, I mean that's alright, but I DO mind this AUNTIE who happily (ok, not happily) pushed her way onto the bus pushing me against the divider rail on the stairs and almost causing my book and wallet to fall. HELLO, AUNTIE WAIT CAN OR NOT?!!?!! Aiyo, so kiasu... That's not the only time I saw her being kiasu by the way. While waiting to alight the bus (I was standing beside the seat infront of the exit door), that auntie pushed me to get the seat in front of me. *smacks head* Gee... She already had a seat earlier know, I saw. Don't have to gan cheong get another seat until have to push people right?????

I am so utterly angry lar! So inconsiderate.

By the way, I really LOVE my personal space and I really don't like being so close to people so I'd appreciate it if this SOMEONE stop trying to touch me just to irritate me. It's NOT funny. Full stop. Still don't get it? Then you deserved that hit by my dear friend's thick hard file. Maybe you need another hit. For those who knows you I'm talking about and is reading this, please help me tell this SOMEONE. It's no use me telling him. It just falls on deaf ears.

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In Need  

Friday, October 27, 2006

I really don't like it when people who don't put in effort in class start looking for me asking me for help when the exams are near.

I don't mind helping if they've tried. In fact, I'm more than glad to be of help. But the thing now is those who don't even try! While they skip classes or when they do attend classes, they talk and make noise, I was trying my best to understand what's being taught in class. Then when they decide it's time to learn, they come to me and expect me to tell them all that I know.

I'm not selfish, as some people seem to think I am. I'm just careful with who I impart my knowledge to. If that person really needs it and has sincerely tried his/her best to make it on his/her own but couldn't, I'd definitely help. Give me a call, sms me, e-mail me, snail-mail me whatever, I'll try to help.

Another thing I notice in some people around me is that they only come to me when they need me. (Thus the note under my MSN nick) When they don't, I sms them also they never reply. I talk to them also like they not sincere. I don't know if they're doing it as a retortion to me because I do that too or not. Please, if I'm like that, let me know, I'll try to change alright. And if I'm not, please treat me like a human being who exists! Not like a robot or something which you switch on only when you need it to work! You don't have to save electricity on me cause I AM NOT A ROBOT/MACHINE.

I won't mention names, of course. I never mention names when I say bad things about somebody, other than my family members haha. So if any of you think that I'm referring to you, let me tell you: you know it best. :)

Geez, school tomorrow, better go to sleep. For your info, yes I came online just to blog about this. By the way, I had a nice and safe Hari Raya and hope you did too!

Some nice pics of my Hari Raya...


First day of Raya, with my grandma at her house.

First day of Raya with my cousin.

Second day of Raya with some relatives.

Second day of Raya with my cousin again.

I just saw my new timetable. 1st CDS: OTC Med, 2nd CDS: Socio. My timetable is so packed I'm head over heels thinking when to pray on Mon, Tues and Thurs. Oh God, help me!!!!

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In Need  

Thursday, October 26, 2006

I really don't like it when people who don't put in effort in class start looking for me asking me for help when the exams are near.

I don't mind helping if they've tried. In fact, I'm more than glad to be of help. But the thing now is those who don't even try! While they skip classes or when they do attend classes, they talk and make noise, I was trying my best to understand what's being taught in class. Then when they decide it's time to learn, they come to me and expect me to tell them all that I know.

I'm not selfish, as some people seem to think I am. I'm just careful with who I impart my knowledge to. If that person really needs it and has sincerely tried his/her best to make it on his/her own but couldn't, I'd definitely help. Give me a call, sms me, e-mail me, snail-mail me whatever, I'll try to help.

Another thing I notice in some people around me is that they only come to me when they need me. (Thus the note under my MSN nick) When they don't, I sms them also they never reply. I talk to them also like they not sincere. I don't know if they're doing it as a retortion to me because I do that too or not. Please, if I'm like that, let me know, I'll try to change alright. And if I'm not, please treat me like a human being who exists! Not like a robot or something which you switch on only when you need it to work! You don't have to save electricity on me cause I AM NOT A ROBOT/MACHINE.

I won't mention names, of course. I never mention names when I say bad things about somebody, other than my family members haha. So if any of you think that I'm referring to you, let me tell you: you know it best. :)

Geez, school tomorrow, better go to sleep. For your info, yes I came online just to blog about this. By the way, I had a nice and safe Hari Raya and hope you did too!

Some nice pics of my Hari Raya...


First day of Raya, with my grandma at her house.

First day of Raya with my cousin.

Second day of Raya with some relatives.

Second day of Raya with my cousin again.

I just saw my new timetable. 1st CDS: OTC Med, 2nd CDS: Socio. My timetable is so packed I'm head over heels thinking when to pray on Mon, Tues and Thurs. Oh God, help me!!!!

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Family-In-Charge and Ramadhan  

Monday, October 23, 2006

It was really really great. A busy day indeed but I loike heheh. Won't go much into details, too many to mention larh.

Farz, just wanna say it's great spending a day with you. Very enjoyable indeed! I'm glad that you trust me enough to confide in me and I'm so sorry if I have nothing much to offer other than a listening ear (two actually) yarr. You're a better counsellor than me that I dunno how to counsel you larh hahaz.

Anyway, did you know that it feels so good to have people say thanks to you in the form of a smile? It is wonderful! Try doing some community service sometime and see how you feel when you get that smile from the people. If you don't get a smile though, don't get discouraged. Please don't. Try again another time and perhaps you will get it and you will truly understand the spirit of service. I really enjoyed giving out the porridges to the neighbours of Darul Ghufran mosque.

Summing all up, it's been really great being part of Darul Ghufran, being given the opportunity to offer a helping hand, especially this Ramadhan.

Since today's the last day of Ramadhan and I'd most likely on't be online for a couple of days, allow me to wish all Muslims a Selamat Hari Raya minal aidil wal faizin! Ku susun sepuluh jari meminta maaf atas segala kesilapanku yang telah lalu (dan kalau boleh yang akan datang juga!), terkasar bahasa ke, terkasar laku ke, apa2 ajalah yang telah menyakitkan hati awak2 semua yang sedang membaca blogku yang tak seberapa ni ye? And to all non-Muslims, enjoy the public holiday! Everyone take care ya!

It's kinda saddening to see Ramadhan ending. So far, this Ramadhan is the best Ramadhan I've had so far. Insyallah, if I get to see more Ramadhan, they'd be better than this year's. Ramadhan adalah bulan yang ditetapkan untuk umat Islam. Bulan inilah syaitan dan sesetegah jin dibelenggu dan nafsu kita dijaga pada siang hari. Aku bersyukur padaMu ya Allah kerana telah memberiku taufik dan hidayahMu untuk memanfaatkan Ramadhan ini dengan sebaik-baiknya.

I really wish I can go on and on but it's 7.30 already and I need to get ready for my first day of my second semester. School starts at 9!!!

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21st Oct  

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

So many events seem to be going on on the 21st. Ghufran is having the family-in-charge and as much as I wanna go for it, none of my family members wanna go boo hoo. Then Istighfar having this event entitled Aku & Dia, kinda curious about it. Or I can always go An-Nahdah, I do wonder where it is and how it looks like, and join Nur-Ikhwan for the last iftar in this Ramadhan.

I just hope I can walk properly by then. Still limping!! My tendons are so enflamed lah... Nevermind, patience.... Kinda hard... Challenges...

I'd been absent three times from Titisan and I'll be absent one more time tonight. But not exactly my fault lah, they all got training in Ramadhan for what?!

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YIC & NOP power!  

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Hahakz, guess I did enjoy it. A bit lonely at first cause everyone seemed to have this partner to talk and laugh with while I joined different different groups and ended up with the solo me. Whatever la, I'm used to this sole figure thing anyway...

Ok, let's start from morning. Reached Ghufran a bit later than the stipulated 9am (Fahmi called my house and hp), but basically I was the fourth in my group to arrive. My group was the one which was sent to help with the mass community service at Istighfar by the way. At first I thought, what seh ten of us suddenly got dumped at Istighfar while the rest play games and clean Ghufran together-gether. But then I realised they were going to clean toilets, nevermind Istighfar better.

We (me, Atikah, Ewanny, Aqilah, Diyanah, Faris, Abdillah, Husni, Harun and Fahmi being the head) left for Istighfar rather late but no problem, some of the Istighfar volunteers came even later. Had a briefing when we reached. We from Ghufran and ten others from Istighfar were supposed to be facilitators! Like woah... What was I to say to the house owners. Needed to remember s
o many things, give the habuan Ramadhan, give the food supplies, give the FIC invitation, get back reply to invitation, help clean the house (my house oso I never help clean lol) and talk to the owners and find out what caused them to ask for help for sharing. So much responsibility!

But just as I was getting used to the idea of being faci, Ust Suffiyan say there's not enough female volunteers and after Zohor prayers, we were reshuffled. Three of the girls from Ghufran were put into the Istighfar groups under Istighfar facis while two others would go to all five houses allocated initially to the Ghufran girls with Ust Suffiyan via car. At first, I was put in the latter group but Atikah wasn't comfortable with the Istighfar girls and so asked to change with me. I don't know what made me agree but I did. I was with Huda (faci) and Amalina, allocated to a house in walking distance but since Diyanah's group needed to take bus and she doesn't have ez-link and I do, I changed again. My group consisted of Syafikah (faci) from Maarif and I forgot the other girl's name from Pasir Ris Crest. We were to go to Puan Johana's house at Blk 164 Tampines.

I tell you, the bag of rice grains and condensed milk was so heavy lah. Fasting somemore, astaghfirullah. First we took the wrong staircase, then when we fnally found the right address, the owner we're looking for had rented the house and wasn't living there!! What the... Patience, face the challenges with petience. It is afterall Ramadhan Youth CHALLENGE right?

In the end we just gave out the three porridges we brought, two to non-muslims, one to a Malay Muslim. The Malay Muslim we gave the porridge to was this old nenek with a cat and know what she asked? "Duit takder?" (translation: no money?) I wanted to roll on the floor and laugh out loud there and then lah! So straightforward this grandma HAHA.

After that we just went back to Istighfar, upon instruction from the mosque of course, via car! The girl's (the one whose name I forgot, I'm so sorry girl!) parents fetched us at Tampines and sent us back to Istighfar, mwahaha. Thank you! The mother actually sat I looked small for my age haha, that's cause I was sitting down, in the car under this pile of styrofoam bowls. You should see me standing outside, I think I actually gained weight this month, ish.

Back at Istighfar, helped out a bit with the porridge packing but soon my fingers felt painful, either burned by the steaming porridge or blissed (erm... from the word blister) by the heavy food stuff I volunteered to carry, and I went to toilet. I thought we'd stay for Asar prayers at Istighfar, then have tilawathon there before going back to Ghufran but Faris said Fahmi and Aqilah already back at Ghufran and wanted us there immediately. We took a taxi back to Ghufran with Harun paying, thank you guy. Along the way Faris was like fuming and muttering profanities lah ok. There was kecoh-ness then in short. It was all a misunderstanding and miscommunication lah actually. I think it was more or less solved, with the help of Mokhsein at Ghufran but Faris wasn't with the group when we went for Street Dakwah and Night of Power, I don't know and don't wanna know.

After Asar prayers at Ghufran, (wah... I missed praying berjemaah...), I joined the Tilawathon shortly before going out to welcome the Istighfar people. There was a long wait in between and I really didn't know what to do. Walked here, walked there,sat down here, sat down there, talked to this person, talked to that person. In other words, I was bored but I didn't wanna listen to the motivational talk cause if I go in, it'd be rude to go back out when the Istighfar people arrive right.

The welcome was kinda cute, lol. The guys on one side, the girls on the other at the entrance. When the Istighfar people arrived, the guys salam the guys, the girls salam the girls, obviously. Like, eh style seh haha whatever lah Marl. After that, all of us went to listen to the motivational talk before break-fast.

The rest was rather uneventful until Street Dakwah. My group was assigned to the Malay Village in Geylang to give out the Ramadhan messages. That was another challenge... Quite many people refused to accept the cards, thinking that they're donation cards or something. I guess I'd do the same thing if I were them... But now I realise, next time when people say something, LISTEN then reply. After seeing the people refuse the cards, it made me feel ashamed of myself for doing the same thing they did all the time to others. Haiz... A lesson learnt here.

By the way, for the first time the whole day, I bonded with Fahmi. He's like this little brother I'd never had haha. Had fun making fun of this near deaf person Ewanny had to visit earlier and feeling guilty right now, hehe, and of how Ust Ahmad drank while walking and we said that the next time an Ust pointed to us that we can't drink while walking, we can say, "But we say Ust Ahmad doing it!" Hahakz, whatever lah. The first joke lasted longer, it fact it last the whole night till the next morning. Fahmi made the joke again while we were waiting for the bus and I couldn't help but laugh at it, sorry lah!

On the bus to Assyakirin, Harun handed out drinks he'd bought to everyone on the bus. Felt guilty for scolding him half the day earlier. Got tired of his friendly chats lah. Thanks for the drinks Harun, haven't had the chance to say it earlier...

At Assyakirin, the boys went to the basement while the girls went to the second floor for supper: curry beef/mutton with french loaves. Kinda nice, but couldn't finish it nevertheless. Fatayaats from Ghufran (and two Widad from Istighfar) were the noisiest and fun-est bunch of people. Kak Aisyah naughty naughty revealed Nadia and Liyana's mistakes, and it was so funny!! Then got this video camera come into the auditorium we were in and Fatayaats were like crazily waving each time the camera passed us haha! At last it was like 1.30am already and time to sleep. Some of the girls in the auditorium, and a few Fatayaats as well I have to admit, were rather irritating, still takling quite loudly while others were trying to sleep. I tossed and turned so many times before finally falling asleep. But just about an hour later, I woke up due to the cold and couldn't get back to sleep so I went outside to sit around for awhile before bathing and getting ready for Qiyamullail.

It was my second Qiyamullail ever, the first being when I was pri 6 at Ghufran, and I was really glad I got it, eventhough I missed one of the prayers. So happy! It just gives you this really good feeling that you achieved it you know.

After Qiyam, we had our sahur before Subuh prayers. We had nasi lemak for sahur, it would have been so nice it the rice had been cooked proprely. Oh well, I was hungry so I did finish more than half of the pack afterall haha.

After Subuh preyers, there was a short debriefing about Street Dakwah. What Kak Aisyah said was really true. What we did is nothing compared to what Rasulullah s.a.w. did last time and what we went through is nothing compared to what he s.a.w. went through. I couldn't agree more. Rasulullah s.a.w. was truly a patient man...

While waiting for the bus after that, some of the girls played bunga api!! Haha, childish right, but looks so fun! I wanted to join in, but so sleepy lah I tell you. Besides, Fahmi and I were retelling the jokes and it was more fun than getting a picture of myself, with that big acne sprouting above my lips while playing with bunga api. Some girls from another mosque who went past us actually said, "Who plays bunga api in front of masjid?" I replied, "For fun what." Haha, they must actually be jealous to see Fatayaats from Ghufran having non-stop fun. Haiz, it's the fasting month and here I am feeling angry towards those girls. But really lah, keep your comments to yourself can or not?!

On the way back to Guhfran, the Fatayaats got a bus to ourselves, woo hoo! One person two seats hahaha. The ride was rather nice, I fell asleep. I was feeling rather... I don't know how to say. But something happened on the bus that made me feel this emptiness in my heart, grrr... What lah... Things should have started well and ended well on this such good event but I was feeling angry every once in awhile during the whole event know... Cobaan....

Wah, I write so long already, 20 paragraphs know! I wanna go sleep lah. Today's the 24th Ramadhan, woo hoo!!! This year's Ramadhan is definitely the best so far, but I know there's a lot of room for improvements. Insyallah, if I reach the next Ramadhan, it'd be an even better one, hopefully one without so much loneliness and anger... Amin. Hadn't gone out with friends at all, except once with Ad to help her, twice with Fatayaats and the rest with family or I was at home/Ghufran.

P.S. Won't be going out a few days now. My Achilles Tendonitis recurred and besides, gotta help my mum make kueh raya!

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Time flies so fast (pun not intented)  

Friday, October 13, 2006

Just a short entry today.

20 days have passed! I'd fast for 20 days and I'd gone for terawih for 20 days too! The terawih part is really a achievement. *Applauds*

I have RYC: YIC at Ghufran tomorrow and then Qiyam at Assyakirin, woo hoo! Excited! Hope everything runs smoothly, insyallah.

Just a last note: Smokers. Why do they have to smoke? What's so nice about smoking? It's CHOKING!!!

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Complains... The bad side of my mum.  

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Okay... I guess I'm gonna start complaining again... But I don't know how and where to begin exactly so I guess I'd just write the WHOLE story.

Yesterday night, I painted my group project as I said I would. Then, I looked at the brushes and the paints and realised it had been such a long time since I last painted a picture. So I squeezed out the red paint and the blue paint and the green paint and so on and so forth and before long (erm... actually it was quite long, took about 2 hours to finish it haha), a page of my Temasek Sec sketchbook was filled with a myriad of colours. It was a painting of the sunset looked by an adult and a child (in shadows) from across the ocean below a palm tree and at the corner was the shadows of tall buildings aka Singapore island. It was brilliant, in my opinion. Too bad I can't post it online cause I have no idea where the camera installation cd is and so I can't upload a pic of the painting. I showed my brother and I'm not sure if he truly appreciated it since he's colour blind but at least he commented that it was nice.

This morning, I woke up to the nagging of my mum who said that I'm practically a useless teenage daughter (anak dara) cause I didn't wake up to help her lay out the table for sahur. Honestly, I never heard her waking me up to help her but she said she did and I even turned to look at her. Okay.... Never heard of semi-consciousness I suppose... Oh well. So then I shall skip that painful sahur of which I was full of jealousy towards my second OLDER brother and that pleasant time I watched Scary Movie 4 dvd with my eldest brother. I was contemplating whether to show my mum the painting I did yesterday. I thought: "What was there to lose right?" Wrong. My mum hardly took a look at it and what she said implied that it's a child's painting. There is a lot to lose alright. I felt so... (never thought I'd use this word yet but) heartbroken. I was so excited to show her. Thought she'd at the very least say a simple four letter word that could have soothed my excitement: "nice". But no! Ouch ouch ouch... Think I should try sending the painting to a competition? Then if I win an award, perhaps I could prove to her that it's no child's play right? Haha nah... I'd probably win the last prize if 'win' is even a suitable word for it. Then I'd be so devastated... Haiz...

Is it too much to expect a compliment from your own mother? I thought that's where most of the compliments people get actually comes from. Who else would see perfection in such an imperfect person but the person who gave birth to him/her? Afterall beauty is in the eyes of the beholder right?

I wonder what am I actually in my mum's eyes... Possibly a lazy bum who is money-minded, selfish, the devil's advocate what else? Well, I'm not just stating those words out of random. She used them to describe me before... Devil's advocate! That's the worse. She always tells me that it's no use sending me to religious class. Oh please... Imagine if she didn't. I wouldn't be spending time helping out at the mosque, praying five times a day and sometimes more, telling her about what my ustazs (practically all of them) teach me, sitting at home more than going out with my friends, single now with no ex and don't plan on being attached anytime soon and bla bla bla. Hmm... I wonder what would have become of me. Perhaps this wild girl who wears tight clothes and mini skirts with tatoos and piercings all over and dyed hair (I've never dyed, rebonded, curled, whatever except cut my hair) going out with guys and coming home late. Whatever lah! Imagine the unimaginable man... And what does she say? It was no use sending me to religious class!! (Please note that I don't mean any discrimination towards anyone in any way whatsoever)

The time when I did well for my term test, all she could say was "This is just the start. What about later?" Have you no confidence in me at all? JUST BECAUSE OF MY 'O' LEVEL RESULTS WHICH DIDN'T GET ME INTO A JC AND INSTEAD I END UP IN A POLY (of which, to be honest I have nothing to complain about, except those little details, and evrything to be grateful for). She'd always wanted me to get into a jc saying that any jc would do as long as it's a jc... I'm doing well in poly and I suppose she still can't accept the fact that I'm not in a jc.

There might be a reason for all this. Maybe she is putting up a facade. You know... maybe she... hmm... WHAT? Why is there even a need to put up a facade in front of me?? Wouldn't praises and compliments just boost my morale and help me do even better? Oh God, grant me patience... If God had perhaps wanted me to go astray, I could have. With all the... (dare I use the word?) shit she'd said about me and to me, I could have just dropped everything and gave up... I could have you know...

When I received my semestral results with 3Zs, 2As and 1B during Titisan training sometime ago, I rather hesitated about telling her my results you know. I somewhat feared what she'd say... I can't remember when I told her my results, but I definitely didn't call home straightaway when I received the result to break the news.

Haiz... Someday I shall write about the good side aite... Everyone has the good and bad side. You shouldn't view someone only from one point of view. That's unfair. But for now, that's it. I'm not feeling as strong as what I did this morning but I'm tired and I suppose writing the good side of my mum would be even longer than the bad side. Besides I really should try to wake up early and help her lay out the table tomorrow morning. It's the duty of a grown up daughter.

By the way, before I end... WE FINISHED THE RELIGIOUS CLASS PROJECTS!!! Except for maybe a few. And... I'VE MEMORISED SURAH FAJR! So I don't have to attend religious class next sunday!!! Yay yay!

Oklah, so tired already. Slept late painting the sunset and doing Sirah project yesterday, then in the afternoon went to Rabia's house do the project until late afternoon then at night went to mosque and came home later than usual. I sure hope the PSI would drop drop drop! Nitez!

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Stressed Out  

Friday, September 29, 2006

Don't laugh at me. I know I'm having the semestral break and should be feeling NON-STRESSED. Nevertheless, I had a mental breakdown yesterday and just started crying. I was like unable to do anything yesterday. I just wanted to lie on my bed and think quietly (speaking of which, I'd been talking to myself lately) but people around me just seemed to be demanding one thing or another! It sucks know... My motivation for ibadah also slowly vanishing. I was so impatient and angry and restless yesterday I couldn't pray properly. Oh God, forgive me. Hopefully, today would be better and tomorrow would be even better and by the last 10 days of Ramadhan, I hope I'd be at my best form.

Anyway, currently in a jumble on my mind right now:
Sirah
Tafsir (Sheesh, I came online for that! Forgot about it completely lol)
Jude Deveraux
Library Books
Help out at Ghufran
Iftar with Ghufran family
Iftar with Nur-Ikhwan (Dunno if I should go...)
Sleep
Sleep
Sleep
Terawih
Read Quran (I thought of finishing 1 juz per day, so I can finish 30 by the 30th of Ramadhan. Oh well, I'm still at Juz 1, like 5-6th page? Hahakz)

Hmm... Been online for quite some time already, think I should get started on the Sirah project. Haiz, I just wanna sleep!! Cya peeps... Talk to me, stop me from talking to myself!!!

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The Reflective Mind... Chewahh...  


Which Energy Archetype are You?

Reflexive Mind

You look inward for self-knowledge and to know your inner feelings. Your energy is contained, reflected, and amplified by your internal emotions.

Personality Test Results

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

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Increase Knowledge, Strengthen Faith n Radiate Compassion  

Monday, September 18, 2006

The theme for this year's Ramadhan Youth Challenge (RYC)... RYC has more or less motivated me to become a better Muslim. With the help of KPR, religious class and one of my religious class books, I am trying. Insyallah, I'll grab the opportunities provided by the upcoming month of forgiveness, Ramadhan. I hope my family and friends will help motivate me further. And I hope Allah will guide me. And you.

Anyway, check out this blog. It's very informative on Islam. And this site. It contains a lot of information on Ramadhan.

We humans sin practically everyday, but Allah doesn't give up on us, yet provides us with a lot of opportunities to redeem ourselves. Our sins can actually be turned into good deeds. Believe: Allah is most forgiving, he forgives our sins even if our sins are as many as the bubbles at sea (heard that somewhere, forgive me for not stating hadiths) on condition that he ask forgiveness from Him in the state of true guilt. Ramadhan is just around the corner. Grab this chance to ask Allah for forgiveness and amplify the QUANTITY of your ibadah. Insyallah, Allah will forgive us.

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And I thought I did well...  

Friday, September 15, 2006

So envious of all those who did extremely well. I did well... well. But not well enough to be considered extremely well, cause I know I could have done better for MST sem paper. Like I kept telling myself, "I should have practiced more... I shouldn't have overlooked it..." bla bla bla. And OC, it's really good but I'm rather disappointed! I thought OC was my strongest subject, the results prove not. As for MST, I know I deserved it lar, should have practiced more!!!!

Oh well... Anyway, congratulations to those whom I considered had extremely well. Congratulations, but "you know you could have done better" to those who got results like me. Not bad, "work harder (and smarter) next semester and you'll reap what you sow" to those who didn't do so well. Last, but certainly not least, "don't despair, you still have time to get the results you want" to those who failed and need to sit for supp paper.

Haiz... Wish I'd gone over to Jamie's house for piano 'lessons'. Would have felt better I suppose.

(Oh God, cheer up Marliyana! Be satisfied with your results now while you can. Start despairing next sem, not now!! :()

PS. Sorry for being away for too long. Computer spoilt. During that time, I had some things happen to me that I could have blogged about then. But now... nevermind...

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Cousins... Fireworks... Dangdut... Camwhoring... Memorial... Memories...  

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Hahaz, long title, but I think it pretty much sums up my night out with my cousins yesterday.

We wanted to watch the fireworks at Esplanade, but well... We were late, so we took a taxi there. Two taxis actually, which was the reason we lost Kak Dayah along the expressway... By the way, the expressway wasn't exactly an EXPRESS way yesterday due to INCONSIDERATE drivers who stopped their car in the middle of nowhere to watch the fireworks. Woitz, the newspaper tell you already right, TAKE PUBLIC TRANSPORT!!!! Really inconsiderate you know... As much as my cousins and I wanna watch the fireworks too, we didn't get out of the taxi until we reached Lau Pa Sat. WE, unlike YOU INCONSIDERATE I-DUNNO-WHAT (don't feel that they are fit to be called humans, not even monkeys. Well, at least monkeys would have jumped off the bridge instead of clogging up the expressway...), TOOK INTO CONSIDERATION THE VEHICLES BEHIND US AND KEPT OUR BUTTS IN THE TAXI (I won't exactly say we kept ourselves in our seats cause that'd be stupid of us as we'd obviously miss the beautiful fireworks display) AND WE STILL GOT TO SEE THE FIREWORKS AND GET PICTURES AND VIDEOS OF IT even at the cost of our discomfort. Irritating know... What I refer to as inconsiderate was PARKING THEIR CARS ALL THE WAY UNTIL THE FIRST (EXPRESS) LANE, the taxi we were in as well as other considerate people had to squeeze through the space between the first lane and the divider. Sheesh...

Anyway, the taxi ride was... undescribeable. The taxi driver was really talkative. All the way before the fireworks started he chatted with my brother about clubs and hotels and what-nots. My cousin was like telling me, "Today they're chatting like old pals and tomorrow they'd meet up to go to some club." The taxi driver likes dangdut so much that he had an Inul's cd in his taxi lol. He was a 60++ chinese by the way. When the fireworks started, he joined in our excitement and was very kind to us, trying to help us get a good view of the fireworks despite the traffic jam.

Let's focus on the fireworks lar ok? Lol. The fireworks weren't really as spectacular as how I imagined it to be. It was rather simple considering today's the last day of all this fireworks thingy. Only towards the end was it pretty, golden flecks filling the maroon sky. I made a terrible mistake of taking a video at the beginning, which meant a lot of car tops and vans and lorries instead of the fireworks itself, and so I didn't have anymore memory space after that video, which meant that I could only take 5 pictures instead of 70 if that video wasn't there!!!!! Lucky, and I mean LUCKY my brother caught 3 videos of it, one of it which showed a very nice display. If not, it would have been such a waste of time, for me lar since my main agenda was to watch fireworks at Esplanade and take a video of it whereas my brother's main agenda was mainly to spend a Saturday evening with our cousins.

After alighting at Lau Pa Sat, we made our way to Esplanade to meet Kak Dayah, which we didn't at the end anyway cause she got lost. Along the way, we took lots of pictures of ourselves and the night scene there. Got some pretty nice pictures, though a lot of the pictures of my brother and me were blurred, aiya. After reaching the Esplanade and knowing that we won't get to meet Kak Dayah, we made our way across the padang to the Memorial, which meant more pictures!!!

I dunno what else to write about, so... Photos!











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Mixed Emotions  

Friday, August 04, 2006

Haha, I dunno what I feel. I have a lot to say, but it's like I feel words can't really put across what I really wanna say. Been bottling up my feelings. Not all are bad, many are good. Erm... I'm like speechless lol. Guess I'll just go to sleep now. Forget about updates. I'll just lose my entries at the end anyway,

Just thinking: Wish I have photoshop and know more about html. I wanna have a personalised blog that makes me feel brighter, happier as how I think everyone should be....

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What's my problem???  

Saturday, July 29, 2006

I keep losing my entries seh!!!! So frustrating! Write so long oredi! I only have very little time to blog and these must happen, aiyoh!

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AGM  

Monday, July 24, 2006

It was great great great!!! After so many practices, during which I always moaned and grumbled, the actual day finally arrived. Eventhough some of us forgot our lines, we managed to cover it up. I was so glad to hear that everyone enjoyed our comedy and we didn't make a fool out of ourselves.

Again, I don't have much time to blog, so I shall just say many great thanks to these people:
Kak Fatin and Kak Raudah for providing delicious breakfast for us
Siddiq (bkn Sidek eh...) for modifying our play
Fifi, Hajar, Ain Kimek and Kak Raudah for putting my make-up for me
All actors for doing a wonderful job
And all others who encouraged me and wished me good luck
If I missed anyone, sorry eh, I'm in a great rush arh. Gtg now peeps, cyaz!

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AGM pics  

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Just a quick one...

From my cam:



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Sniff Sniff  

I lost my entry on AGM.... I wrote long long oredi lehx... Now is nearly 4am oredi, I too tired... Next time... :(

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My life summarised...  

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What title to write ar??  

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Just read some of my friends', who're in JC, blogs and I'm super duper grateful that I'm in poly. I think I'd cry everyday if I were in JC. Nevertheless, I wish my friends all the best and may they get the motivation to study and do well in school.

Back to me... I've been doing quite well in school so far. In religious class too. But I shall heed Dickson's advice and aim higher. And I will work hard yet smart to reach my aim. It's not as easy as it sounds. I have involvement in Tits and eventhough it is nothing compared to many others, it does take a toll on me and I've been feeling lethargic and lazy lately.

I've been trying to use Dickson's Stomping method, but it's not working! I'm not firm enough! I haven't been revising much ever since the new term began and I feel really really bad about it.

Anyway, this afternoon, the fire in me to learn how to play the piano returned, ever brighter. What happened was that I was practising the basics that Val taught me on the piano in MS04 when all the Tits members remaining went quiet. Sis Eli and Raudah complimented me and I admit that I kembang lar eh. But seriously, that was basics!! Fifi asked me to play something else and what I told her was the truth, "I dunno anything else!!!" Well, I can play that monotonous bit of Beethoven's 'Bells are Ringing'... And how boring is that! I can't even remember the Happy Birthday, Majulah Singapura and Dayung Sampan notes lar...

Uh oh, it's after midnight already. Have religious class tomorrow liao... Just some last words then. AGM will be at 11am on Saturday, 22nd July at the Alumni Lounge. Only TP students are allowed to watch, sadly... Hope any TP students reading would attend it. Tits would be the fifth item and I tell you, it'd give you something to think and laugh about for a few days at least! It's really funny if you can hear what the casts are saying. What I mean is if you cooperate and keep quiet while watching lar. There's no mikes and our voice projections aren't at our best yet. Well, we only had 3 days of practice so far! Though I think that's quite enough lol. I'm getting sick of doing the same things over and over again.

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Blogskins  

Saturday, July 15, 2006

Well, I was contemplating whether to change my blogskin or not when I came across this blog which talks about the don'ts in blogskins. Refer to 25th Aug 05. I gotta agree with some of it, like the part about the entry frame getting smaller and the pictures getting larger.

I dunno how to create my own blogskin... I've been using free blogskins from www.blogskins.com and maybe edit a bit here and there, and now I just want something simple and personalised. But lazy lar... But I'm getting really sick of my blogskin. The lyrics on the front had long flown from my head and the meanings are half gone already.

I have a new motto that keeps me going, no longer just dream and keep on dreaming. I dunno how to phrase my motto, since it's a jumble of so many things in one.

Aiyar, I just continue my entry here lar wokay? Lazy to add new entry..

Have Tits at 10am tomorrow. I hope my voice projection and character improves. I admit I haven't done research... My excuse: no time, heheh as usual...

Will be having Biochem quiz 2 next thursday and Maths and OC quiz 2 on next friday. HAP will be on the 28th and PIPC is on God-knows-when in August I guess. I must do well in my quizzes. As insignificant as they seem/sound, they contribute to the final result and I can say I'm rather ambitious for my final result. And no, I'm not gonna reveal what my target is until after the results most probably, or at least not anytime soon.

AGM rehearsals will take place next thursday and friday and I think I'm gonna miss them. It's either that or I miss lectures/tutorials. No way would I do the latter! Studies definitely prioritise over most other things to me, including CCA no matter how involved I am in it.

Anyway, spent $95 (my dad gave me $100 for UNnecessities thanks to his bonus) buying 4 clothes at Singapore EXPO yesterday. I simply luuuurvvvvve new clothes. Gonna where one of them tomorrow!!

I have so much to blog. I've come to regard my blog as a diary, but I'm still aware a blog is open to public and I'm not risking regretting what I blog about.

Dunno what else to say. Just: Happy belated 21st birthday Gaythri!! Sorry I didn't know it was your birthday. I'm broke too... :(

Haiz, regret not having pictures of the log cake Alia and some of my classmates bought for me and Celine for our birthday last year... Oh well, things can be lost, but memories last a lifetime, if you don't lose your memory halfway along your lifeline that is. I think losing my memory is the worst fear I have. Though it can prove to be a blessing in disguise if you ask me (for reasons unrevealed).

Sleepy already... Gonna check my APEL Life Mission Statement for awhile, and then I'm off to bed. Hopefully, tomorrow the sun shines brighter and the wind blows stronger on me, and you! ;)

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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Tits rox! AF14 oso rox! Heheh... It's true... Believe it...

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Eventful Weekend  

Monday, July 10, 2006

Heya haido! Hmm... I actually sound happy... Whole day in school I was grumpy and moody. Dunno lar. It's about 6.15pm now, am waiting for Tits to begin at 6.30pm. So well, 15 minutes to jot down what I wanna!

On Saturday, I went to my cousin's engagement at Pasir Ris (will upload the pics soon). Marriage... When two hearts become one... Or is it really? I dunno.

Anyway, after the engagement, my brother and I went to meet my cousin on my mum's side to Orchard as planned. My brother wasn't too happy about the arrangement. He'd planned to play xbox after the engagement and not to accompany me to Orchard to see the LIME flea market, which I agree was just a waste of time after I saw it, and to go buy something at Far East Plaza. It was obvious lar he was bored being in Orchard. In the end, after going to the LIME flea market, my brother, cousin and I went to Far East Shopping Centre beside Wheelock's place to play pool. For my case, to learn pool. So far I've learned the rules and have managed to hit the ball in a straight line, but still gotta practice! Though I really agree with my mum that playing pool is a real waste of money... $7 per hour, can get two plates of chicken rice as my cousin would put it lol!

Enough about Saturday... I've got like 5 minutes left! Yesterday... After religious class (and lotsa laughter in Ust Azman's class), I followed my mum to attend my grandmother's neighbour's daughter'd wedding. Haha, whatever lar, skip that... At night, around 7pm, my brother called me to say my cousin (the one we went to Orchard with) wanna celebrate his birthday at Seoul Garden and wants me to come along. I was reluctant lar... I hadn't done my Maths tut, printed out HAP tut and typed out and print my CSAS group project. Neither had I ironed my clothes and lab coat. I didn't wanna go cos I'm not such a big eater and it would just be a waste of money to blanja me at Seoul Garden. Nevertheless, I went in the end anyway cos my cousin and his sister came personally to drag me along lolx, causing them to be late to book for seats. Sorry!!

Alamak, I really gotta go oredi. Will hopefully continue before the end of the week. Chill out!

P.S. Somehow I feel as if I'm writing an article for a school magazine or something lol.

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Thotz  

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Hadn't updated for some time already. Let's see... The last time I blogged was like... two Saturdays ago, and in between I've celebrated by parents birthday! Happy Birthday Mama (30th June) and Baba (8th July). Whee! I love celebrating birthdays whenit comes to filling my stomach heheh. Had pizza and a mixed fruit birthday cake for my mum's birthday and seafood for my dad's. Yum yum!

Hmm... I don't have any inspiration to write anything.

Oh my God, my mum just called me MINAH KENTAL!! Well, not to say that I am one lar. Just that I'm gonna wear kebaya or something Malay-ish to my cousin's engagement later and then after that I plan to drag my brother meet my cousin, on my mum's side one, to Orchard to go Far East and LIME's flea market. If I go home to change first, it would waste a lot of time and if I bring t-shirt and jeans to change, where am I supposed to change and chuck my kebaya?? Dunno what, my mum then 'chanted' minah kental wear kebaya to Orchard. Whatever... Then I got say lar I wear a long skirt and top, my mum say it's inappropriate for the engagement. Alamak, then what?? Aiyoh, I'm confusing myself and I'm sure all you readers too, gah! Even my English is upside down inside out lol.

Anyway, forgot to say why I'm home at this time on a Saturday morning since normally I'd be at Titisan, Tits for short. Well, Bro Sidek will be performing at the Arts House for Kato Kato this afternoon and some of the Tits members wanna go. So as not to rush them, there's no Tits today and the devise (I think) scriptwriting will continue Monday evening. *groans* Oh wellz... TP is slowly becoming my second home. Goodbye TMS...

Since I'm on the topic of Tits, allow me to talk about it. I gotta say I regard it as a laughing session for me lol, but of course it's more than that. I learn a lot from Tits, not only about acting for your info. The members are great people and they bring the best out of you, though I gotta say some can be a bad influence. Oh well, what's life without the challenge. I can definitely prevent myself from smoking since I hate it to the core but to prevent myself from using bad words might prove harder than it seems. My language has been worsening and I intend to heal it back to what it originally was, if not better than that. Not an easy task when the bad words are stuck to your tongue like tar om the roads.

One thing though, I've yet to be myself in Tits. It will take time for sure. I'm not even fully myself with my classmates yet. Hmm... Or maybe I've changed? Dunno lar, people change but it's always someone else who notices the change in you while you believe that you'd been the same since young.

Wah, look at the time! My dad reach home already, so I assume we'll be going to my cousin's house pretty soon, gotta get ready.

By the way, I might be changing my blog layout soon! Or at least add new stuffs... Tataz all!

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What Season Are You?  

Saturday, June 24, 2006

Out of four seasons, I'm tied on two: Spring and Fall. They're like complete opposites! The determining tie-breaker was to choose my preference between the two below:

1. You think before you act, and weigh your options before making any solid decisions.
2. Before the end of something, you are already looking for the beginning of something new.

I dunno which is more me! So I put both results here:

You scored as Spring. You are SPRING. Ever optimistic, you readily greet each day with an open mind, and with gladness in your heart knowing that even should life share its dimness with you, the sun -will- come out.



What Season Are You?
created with QuizFarm.com
You scored as Fall. You are FALL. You appreciate all that you have, and are willing to share with others. You are a friend in the truest sense of the word, and can easily focus your attention on those who need you, placing yourself on the back burner. You make sure your responsibilites are met before you allow yourself free time.

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I'm Falling... Someone Catch Me  

When you feel all alone
And a loyal friend is hard to find
You're caught in a one way street
With the monsters in your head
When hopes and dreams are far away and
You feel like you can't face the day

Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone

'Cause there has always been heartache and pain
And when it's over you'll breathe again
You'll breath again
-an excerpt from 'Crash and Burn' by Savage Garden

This morning, after hearing that the people around me are facing some kind of crisis whereas I'm just sitting around being happy with myself, I felt lucky and glad.

Just a few minutes/hours (I can't remember) back, I started to feel despair, loss and... and... I dunno! Infer from the song excerpt. Over what, I don't know...

Now I can't even enjoy the songs in my Winamp tracks, which I normally do.

I have only the slightest idea of why I'm feeling so. It may be coz I'd just finished reading the second part of lotr-rotk (or book 6... I skipped book 5 coz I think the movie captures the best moments) about Frodo going into the West with the elves this evening. After the book ended, I was like singing 'Into the West' by Annie Lennox to myself and well, maybe my heart just started weeping. But then again... How can it be?? Books are just stories! Life is REALITY! Or is it reality that I feel so about?

It's raining and there's thunder. It's like the weather is trying to fit my mood. Hmm... Or perhaps... My mood is trying to fit the weather?!

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Boredom  

Friday, June 23, 2006

O...K... As bored as I am, I'd never be as bored as to do THIS!!!

The URL itself is already so long, for your info.

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Restless & Worried Over the Unknown  

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Dunno why I'd been feeling so lately. I feel so stressed and tense AND IT'S THE HOLIDAYS!!! Maybe 'coz I feel for the characters in Lord of the Rings - The Two Towers, which I'm currently reading, surprisingly lol. I'm at the part where Frodo, Sam and Gollum had just been released by Faramir. And this part is so full of suspense! Maybe too 'coz school will be reopening soon, which means... TERM TEST RESULTS!! Argh!!! I really hope I do well...

I have lotsa more to write but nevertheless, I'm very exhausted and tired after a long long day of Titisan and visiting my grandmother. I just wanna drop on my bed amongst the messiness (is there such a word??) and fall into a deep slumber... But there's a lot of things on my to-do list which I'm eager to do first before I sleep, and I've just done one - BLOG! Haiz, alas I'm finding blogging a chore again. Maybe I need a change of blogskin or I should take a break from blogging. Hmmz... I hope it's not the latter... Blogging helps me clear my mind and heart...

Oh by the way, I just knew... Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom is considered a non-fiction, whoopsie! Pardon my mistake peeps. *wry smile*

One more thing, I read in the papers that bloggers are using 'broken' English while blogging, thus contributing to the factor of why Singapore's English standard has dropped. My reply: Then what do you expect? Perfect English?? It'd defeat the purpose of blogging altogether! I mean, blogging is like... speaking, in a way. So, we gotta use colloquial English right...

Klah, I wanna watch Impian on Suria now. Shamsydar and Farzana are on tv! Vote for them kk?

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Tagged!!!  

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Wokay... I got tagged by Sylvia lol. Here goes:

What were you doing in secondary school?
1. Studying for O levels...
2. CCA...
3. Crapping with friends...
No life...

Five of your favourite singers / bands?
1. Westlife (whatever you say...)
2. The Corrs
3. Kopratasa
4. Josh Groban
5. Jamie Cullum
My music likes and dislikes are normally different than my friends.

Five things you would do if you were a millionaire?
1. Buy laptop
2. Travel around the world
3. Serioously, I don't think I'd get this much money...
4. Fix the kitchen cabinets for my mum
5. Save for university!!!

Five bad habits?
1. I like to touch my face thus the pimples...
2. Bad temper
3. I'm super hygiene conscious
4. Last minute studying - cramping
5. Lying down on the cold hard floor while watching tv

Five things you like doing?
1. read
2. take photos of nature
3. travel
4. cross-stitch
5. write

Five things you would never buy, wear or get?
1. cigarettes (won't EVER buy)
2. MP3/4 (won't get - anytime soon at least)
3. laptop (won't get - anytime soon at least)
4. pork (LOL)
5. leather jacket (just not my kinda thing)

Five favourites? <-- so ambiguous!
1. pink
2. sleep
3. Harry Potter
4. Lord of the Rings
5. languages

Five people to do this?
1. Val
2. Marcus
3. Raudah
4. Karen
5. Izyan
Seriously, I don't think these 5 would know they've been tagged if I don't tell them.

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Bright Full Moon  

Friday, June 16, 2006

On my way back from Titisan the other night, I saw this really big, bright, full moon. At first I thought it was some kind of building's mark or something, but turned out it's the moon! I'd wanted to take a picture of it, but it was very hard to from the car. When I reached home, I looked around for the moon, cannot see... So sad... Then the next morning I saw the moon, it is much smaller though still bright. Still...





Last night I looked out for the moon again and I got this:

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Titisan  

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

I just came back from Malay Arts Group (MAG) - Drama otherwise called Titisan and I had lotsa fun!

At first I was reluctant to go. I was telling Athirah, "I just thought it's gonna be a school-free term break..." But turns out, there's nothing to groan about. It was like a laughter session lol! Laugh and laugh until my stomach hurts and my eyes water la I tell you.

We did this sajak creation thingy whereby there's four of us in each group and each one of us comes up with a word to connect to the word the person before us gave. The sajak has three sets of four lines of four words. The whole sajak will surely turn out crappy! My group has like "Pengatin baru meniggal dunia (Newly wed couple meets their death)" and "Apa-entah-dah-lupa malam pagi semalam (I-can't-remember-the-word night moning yesterday)" and more. Crap right?! The other group even funnier: Unsangkarable rhymed with table!!! Hahahakz!

After that, we got to work coming up with a play for AGM (I have no idea what it stands for so don't ask...). It is a very creative way how we did it. Firstly, all 16 of us give different themes. Then we try to see how the themes link to each other. It was very odd... We had words which differ like how north is opposite of south and east is opposite of west yet we could link up every single theme except for one. We had "crazy", "mad", the bachelor", "cavemen", "X-men", "Benchwarmers", "Police and Thief", "Cartoon", "Puppets", "Old folks home", "Hitler", "Rock Opera", "Silat", the cancelled out "Bollywood" and two more I can't remember. After that, we got back into our groups of fours and came up with a story skeleton. When that's done, we voted for the best and this Saturday, we'll meet up again to neaten up the storyline. You guys just wait and see AGM man... Comedy! Hahakz!

I just hope I can go on Saturday. Laughter is the best medicine!

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Bloggies  

I'd like to introduce 2 more blogs: Fityan-Ghufran and Nur-Ikhwan.

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Impact  

How do we determine how good a book, a movie, a show, an article and whatever else is? Impact. It is the impact that determines how good something is. Anything that leaves us laughing, crying, smiling, angry, thinking, shaking your head, nodding your head and such shows that it is good. Even if it is friendships/relationships that we're talking about. Have a nice day!

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Charmed  

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Today will be the last episode of Charmed on Star World! I nearly forgot! I wonder when the next season will be on... Anyway, for those Charmed fans out there, check this out.

Anyway, went to Giant this afternoon with my parents. There was a slight jam at the Singapore customs on our way there, but it gave me the chance to take some really nice pics. We didn't do much at Giant, just had brunch and then we went to the supermarket to buy the necessities. I got myself 4 pairs of slippers and a really nice pink top. Haha, one more pink top to be added to my wardrobe!

Hmm... Nothing much to say... So I'll just post some pics for all to view! Afterall, "a picture paints a thousand words" right? :)







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Term Break  

Monday, June 12, 2006

The term tests are over and term break is here! My friends in JC laughed at me coz we Poly students only have a two week break in June, but then I laughed back at them. They have a four week break in June, but they gotta use all that time to study for their exams which they gotta sit for when school reopens whereas we can enjoy ourselves and have a true break.

Speaking of enjoying the break, I don't have much plans. Will be crossing the causeway to go Giant or Angsana tomorrow and that's it. Will be there for like 5 hours and then I'll see the causeway again. No life man... I wanna go to Cameron Highlands again! Even though I had a bad experience there the first and also the last time I was there, the scenery is simply fantastic there and I'm a huge fan of beautiful landscapes.

Oh well... I guess I'll just sit at home and do the things I normally do: Read novels, blog about my half-rotted life, write a sure-won't-finish story, watch tv, eat, sleep, visit my grandma and shop (hopefully). I wanna go ice-skating or rock-climbing but I dunno who to ask along!

The one thing I wish to do now is to go to Esplanade and walk around with my digicam, taking mesmerizing pictures. Hah, as if my parents would allow that... I love taking pictures. It makes me feel so happy and excited, lol.

Haiz, dunno what else to write. Like no inspiration... Guess I'll just add one last thing before I go. Erm, alamak I forgot what to write haha. Nevermind then, till next time!

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Reflection  

Saturday, June 10, 2006

I did some self-reflection after reading 'Tuesdays with Morrie' by Mitch Albom. I wonder things like, "Am I happy with what I'm pursuing now?" or "Am I pursuing my dream because it's my passion or something else?" The book is really worth your read. It discusses a lot about the things we go through in life and no, it's not a non-fiction. It's an truly inspiring true story. Check it out!

Anyway, I was reading through my e-mails when this caught my attention: People who don't have dreams don't have much. I really agree with that. Dreams give us drive. Dreams motivate us. Dreams keep us alive. Some people would say, "Get Real!" but reality is usually like the cold, hard floor we hit when we fall. It hurts.

I heard something recently about free things. Nothing in this world is free. We pay for the water. We pay for the air (environment tax). We pay to live. I've got a reply to that: Love is free. But then I thought back, yes love is indeed free, yet most p-eople give love and expect something back in return. That's not right. It's like you're asking for 'payment' for the love you give. Oh wellz.

Reflect and discover yourself.

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Reach for the STARS  

Sunday, June 04, 2006

Hmm... Maybe what Ella said is true... Maybe poly is where I can shine... At least I hope she's true. I won't go into details coz I think it's too early to say anything now. Pray for me k.

For now, I'd better go back to revising. I'd been chatting with my friends online for the past 2-3 hours and it's really late now...

I hope I'll do well for my term tests.

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Interesting Week  

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Very interesting indeed. Unfortunately, I can only tell those of utmost importance. I really have a lot of thngs to do before I go to bed...

On Tuesday, I quit Samba. I told them that Samba is not my kin of thing and they accepted it. On Wednesday, I joined MAG Titisan and I seriously think that's where I belong, though my parents are worried drama might affect my studies again.

On Friday, we had CCN Day. AF14 sold ice-cream floats. My job was just to advertise, but I didn't think I did a good job. I was better at taking candid photos of my classmates and some are really hilarious heheh.

After CCN Day, I went to Tampines Mall with my mum to buy a new phone, whee!!! It's a Nokia 7360. I took the student plan. Have 1000 free sms, ALL DAY free incoming call and 150min free outgoing call. First 3 months $13, subsequent 7 months $18 and the following year $30.20. I didn't want to take this plan but my dad calculated and said it's cheaper thsn my current plan, so ok lor! He's the one paying afterall...

On Saturday, I had MAG Titisan audition. I don't know how I did, though I know my audition is really short compared to others. I won't go into details, I gotta go now!

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The Latest in my Life  

Monday, May 22, 2006

Finally, after so long, I get to blog again. Been busy studying for Biochem, HAP and Maths quizzes as well as religious class exams the past week. There's barely any time to switch on the computer what more blog! The quizzes/exams were ok... I think I can pass for all the quizzes. For my religious class exam, I should be able to get an A for Akhlak/Aqidah and Arab. Sadly, there's a possibility that I fail Ibadah. Well... After all I didn't study much for it.

Anyway, as some of you may know, I'd been rather sick (flu and cough and lotsa lotsa phlegm) and I was still sick yesterday. Guess what? Ustaz Azman was like making fun of me throughout the exam duration! The whole room, which have three classes in it, was like laughing AT ME! So bad... Then Ustaz Hatta joined him and they were like talking and talking. They even talk to me (and laugh at me for that matter). It was hard to concentrate, but by hook or by crook I had to finish my papers in 1 hour each. For Akhlak/Aqidah and Ibadah, I left a lot of the Section C open-ended questions blank. What was I supposed to do?? I was already so sleepy from spending the night studying. For your info, I slept at 4am on the floor in the living room and woke up at 7am to continue studying. I know it’s so last minute. Yah, my fault also lar, procrastinate procrastinate. Help!!! This can’t go on if I wanna excel in my studies. I must be consistent, sigh…

Oh yah, did you know that the buildings at the CBD area (I think… It’s that area from Orchard to Shenton Way, passing by the Padang, Esplanade and Singapore Convention Centre) look really nice at night?? I just discovered that yesterday when I passed by the area on the way to and from Harbourfront to fetch my mum. The esplanade was simply stunning! And all those tall buildings! I really regretted not bringing along my camera. I would have, if I had known the beauty of the area at night… I really regretted it. I really love taking landscape pictures. I’d taken a lot of pictures of the landscapes in/from TP. I wish I can upload them and post them here. TP is a really nice place, though small.

Haiz… I’m so hungry liao… I bought the Mee Goreng from the ITAS canteen during lunch just now. It looked and tasted really great the other day Ad bought it, but today is just a mass of burnt mee and egg. Salty! I think I’ll go Mac after this. The twister fries are back!!!! Right? I’d been wanting to eat it since last week.
Back to updates. Last Tuesday, I went to TP Samba Band practice at the Arts Space. It was… rather… I dunno. I guess it’s just not my type of thing. I enjoy music, but maybe playing an instrument is just not my forte. I was planning to quit, but I dunno what made me say “I will” when a few of the Samba members asked me to come tomorrow this afternoon. I really wanna join Drama Tec or MAG Drama or TPSU or ASSC, but what should I do about Samba?? I don’t wanna have two CCAs again. It really took a toll on me in secondary school. I wanna concentrate in my studies, so I can prove to my parents I can still make it to university. Know what? My mum still hasn’t come to terms me being in poly instead of JC. I’m sure it was just a slip of the tongue, but aren’t slips of the tongue the hidden truth most of the time? I cried when I heard it. Does L1R4=13(after minus CCA bonus points) means I’m a failure?? No right?! It’s no use if I do really well for the Biochem, HAP and Maths quizzes. My mum would just say something like, “It’s just the first quiz”. What happened to moral support parents are supposed to give? Where’s the “I know you can do it if you work hard enough” or “I’m right behind you” kinda lines we normally read in novels and words we hear on tv? Reality often sucks. Gee.

Anyway, my uncle passed away due to liver/lungs failure two weeks ago on 5/5/06. It was really unexpected. I didn’t even know he was sick. All of a sudden at 4am in the morning, my mum woke me up saying my uncle is on the brink of death at the hospital. We reached there in time for his last breath, but he was already comatose… I wasn’t close to him, but it left a huge impact on me. My uncle could have been me. My uncle could have been my direct family members. I saw my grandma and mum cry. They’ve lost a son and a brother. I can’t imagine what it’d be if my brother goes before me. There’s too many memories that would haunt me day and night for weeks I’m sure. At the same time I wonder what I’d do if God decides to take my parents. I’m one of those very lucky people who still have both a father and a mother and they are still together. Very lucky indeed.

Let’s go to a lighter note. I wanna buy a new handphone!!! At first, I had my eyes on Nokia 7360, but after seeing the functions my mum’s Nokia 7370 have, I also want Nokia 7370!!! But the Nokia 7370 like fat and heavy… I like to hang my phone around my neck and fat handphones make ME look fat. My dad has agreed to give me $50 for it. I don’t really know what’s holding me back actually. I think my phone is worth $80-100 if I were to trade it in…

I spend nearly an hour here already... I came to the library to do Maths and study for PIPC lehx!!! Aiyo, me so bad, haha. Anyway, check out my caregroup AF14's moblog here!

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