Just something to boost your/my/our morale... I know there's barely 2 weeks left before the event. Amacam? Excited? Dah prepared? If you're feeling unsure...

KEEP GOING!!!!!!

Remember... "Out of sight is Out of Mind... so always keep your GOALS insight and inside". Always remember our objectives and what we want the pax to leave the event with.

And... "Know your PURPOSE and UNDERSTAND the JOURNEY. If the road is harsh, it is meant to be. You never walk alone." Yup, yup, I never said this is gonna be easy. On the day, we may have a lot of changes and problems, but we're all in this together! We shall be there for each other insyaAllah.

Just keep going alright! We're doing this in our aim to achieve mardhatillah. InsyaAllah we'll be blessed for our efforts in this...

(Ingatlah, sesungguhnya pertolongan Allah itu amat dekat)

Sukerr seh dapat blog niari. Sampai 4 posts!!

I think pics are due!!!

My 19th Birthday Bash Part 2! 6th Mar 08

I share a birthday with Ibn Battutah hehe.

The ulcer in my mouth is getting worse! I can hardly close my mouth, what more to eat and drink seh..

Ok, super random nvm...

Awww, I miss my bloggie! Haha, yep had no internet connection for the past few days. Used my bro's comp, can't use long long mah...

Anyway, there's a lot to share actually. But nvm, I just take a few important ones.

Firstly, my atuk sedare masuk hospital due to heart problems. He was in ICU for the past few ddays, but got better and has been transferred to a normal ward yesterday alhamdulillah. Nevertheless, let's pray that Allah gives him strength and puts him back into good health. Hadidahkan Surah Al-Fatihah to him may he gets well soon ye? Oh he kirim salam to belia-belia ghufran anw..

Secondly, Cikgu Fauzan came to KPR class to meet us! Just nak sampaikan his salam to all who knows him...

Thirdly, I came across this:

'I asked for Strength.........
And Allah gave me Difficulties to make me strong.

I asked for Wisdom.........
And Allah gave me Problems to solve.

I asked for Prosperity.........
And Allah gave me Brain and Brawn to work.

I asked for Courage.........
And Allah gave me Danger to overcome.

I asked for Love..........
And Allah gave me Troubled people to help.

I asked for Favours.........
And Allah gave me Opportunities.

I received nothing I wanted ........
I received everything I needed!'

Afterall, Allah is the All-Knowing! What you feel is right may not be right and what you feel is wrong may not be wrong. :D

Fourthly, Liyana shared an ayat from Surah Baqarah to lift my spirits and I thought I'd share here!

"Apakah kamu mengira bahwa kamu akan masuk syurga,padahal belum datang kepadamu (cobaan) sebagaimana halnya orang-orang terdahulu sebelum kamu?mereka ditimpa oleh malapetaka dan kesengsaraan,serta digoncangkan (dengan bermacam-macam cobaan) sehingga berkatalah Rasul dan orang-orang yang beriman bersamanya:bilakah datangnya pertolongan Allah?Ingatlah,sesungguhnya pertolongan Allah itu amat dekat." Surah Baqarah Ayat 214.

Fifthly, I'd like to share about two stories I heard yesterday which brought tears to my eyes and sebak di dada. But I'm not so sure how it goes... I'll try my best ye.

There was a blind old Jewish lady who begs at a market place. She will always criticise Rasulullah s.a.w. for bringing in a new religion. Everyday, there will be this man who comes to feed her. But one day, someone else was there to feed her and she knew it was not the usual man! She pudhed him away and said, "You're not the usual man who comes to feed me! His hands were gentler! Where is he??" The man who was pushed away replied, "He has passed away." That man who replied was Saiyidina Abu bakar (if I'm not mistaken) and the man who had always fed the old jewish lady was Rasulullah s.a.w himself. Saiyidina Abu Bakar knew about Rasulullah's daily routines and felt obligated to continue what Rasulullah had done. When the old Jewish lady found out that the man who had always fed her was the same man she had always critiicised, which is none other than Rasulullah s.a.w, she embraced Islam.

There was another story about a lady whose house Rasulullah s.a.w has to pass by all the time. This lady would always put harmful things in his path like sharp plants and such to injure Rasulullah. (If I'm not mistaken, not only does she do that, she would also hurl bad language at Rasulullah) One day, Rasulullah noticed that there was nothing in his path that might injure him and he wondered what had happened to the lady. She went to her house and when she saw him, she said harshly, "What?? Now that I'm ill, you have come to say bad things to me??" Turns out, no, Rasulullah wasn;t there to say or do bad things to her. Instead, he was there to render help to an ill lady.

This brings me to another story. But I shall not tell it. Just listen to it kk.


Sixthly, there is a arabic poem I keep hearing titled 'Mawlay' or 'Qasidah Burdah'. I find it a very nice song. But I'm not so sure of the meaning... This video I put here has the translations written at the bottom. However, I'm not sure if the translations are right. Also, the words are super small I can hardly see.


Seventhly, I might be MIA for quite some time... Till school reopens I think... I dunno...

Eightly, is there such a thing as fourthly, fifthly, sixthly, seventhly and eighthly??? LOL, nvm...

I am tired. I am exhausted. And I am not feeling too well...

But insyaAllah I'll keep on going to the last.

I'll try to walk the talk and show my young brothers and sisters, and even the older ones too if they're willing, the true spirit of resilience.

There are ups and downs, and during the downs, we should never give up, we should continue to give our best.

Do pray for me though. Without the strength from Allah, I won't be able to carry these out. Without His will that would ease the tasks set out for me, I won't be able to do all this.

I am no good. I am no good. But I'm trying to improve myself. Do show me guidance and provide me support and motivation.

Cause it just sucks when you have failed to do a task set out for you, and you're all stressed up over it and then comes a person who hurls discouraging words at you. That really sucks larh...

6 Fityan Commandments... I kept breaking them... :(

Seriously uh, what a day, what a day, what a day!!!!

I've got news, good news actually but somehow they feel like a burden on me. I know they are opportunities for me, and I know some opportunities only come once never to knock on your door ever again if you decide to turn it down.

On the other hand, I had a chat with my mum. She was having her own dilemma and she was feeling grieved over it. And obviously I as her daughter don't want her to feel grieved. But what makes ME feel grieved now is that, part of the reason she was grieved was because of ME. Oh wow...

I am no good. I know that. I have compared myself with others. I AM no good. I have so much to improve. SO SO much.

I'm so confused!! I'm like sitting here thinking and thinking, what should I do, what am I supposed to do, what what WHAT??!!

And I'd been getting a lot of 'why's from people. Why this. Why that. Why why WHY??? But I can't blame them for asking 'why' uh. It's true that everything I do should have a very good reason as to WHY in the world did I decide to do it. But it's just that sometimes it feels as if I'm being interrogated. It's so intimidating you know. It's so so scary. Someone told me, "You look like you were being bullied!" Ya, I know.. Seriously, sometimes I just shrink in my seat when I'm asked 'why' such that I feel like there's this big bully in front of me. Haha, that is soooo exaggerating I know.

Things have not been easy lately. I had to make decisions. I had to seriously manage my time. There's a lottt of things I learnt no doubt. Things I learn from the mistakes I did. And, yeah there were a LOT of mistakes. Ouch, it's always painful to fall down, uhuh.

Time really flies. i can't believe it's Friday! Where did the week go to??!! I thought it was just this afternoon I was meeting my fellow NIans at Afghanistan!! What did I do this week??

Yes, quite a lot happened, but it feels like NOTHING is done! Zero, kosong, nada! Oh no, oh no, oh no! <---that stands for *gasp* *panics!!!!!*

K, gotta go back to bed work...

Cu when I cu...

Please don't leave me alone. I'm scared. Very very scared...

[P.S. the title may sound so random. But I DO have a REASON for it, just that I'm too full to explain. Why do you bother to know about my choice of title anyway. Hah, NAH, amek kau! I juz gave you a 'why' question]

Just for the record...

I have been with this laptop of mine for nearly 16hrs today everywhere I go (cept the toilet larh) till my arm felt numb this afternoon. Nasib tak putus.

I had two meetings today... Please remind me again not to have 2 meetings in one day!! Tak serik-serik.

I have 11 windows explorer tabs open, 12 microsoft words doc open, 1 microsoft powerpoint doc open, 2 microsoft excel doc open, 4 (6 actually) folders open, 12windows messenger chats open and 1 windows movie maker open...

I talked to I dunno how many people.

I have a dozen things floating in my head. 4 of which requires my urgent attention (ouch, my head hurts BADLY).

I had 7 people gather in msn to give ad a 'live' virtual birthday card wishes on msn lol.

To end this off, HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY AD =) No jokes from me. Nothing from me actually. Just my best wishes and dua for you my dear. Smile!!!

Just a reminder to myself to keep me on track. Whatever I'm doing is only for one cause, which I truly believe in. I hope this niat will continue to stay pure and true (banyak temptations lately) astaghfirullah...

Oh my God, I'm addicted to Ummah Films! The videos are like tazkirahs that makes you think... Do watch this one titled 'Why Islam' on why he converted to Islam. Much of what he says are true...



I've watched 7 thus far and I dunno how many more I'd be walking before I can get back to work. Opps!

Dun have time to watch the video above and you dunno what I'm talking about? It's ok, I was just like you yesterday ;)

Anyway, something came to my mind while I was walking home just now. And it sounds like this:

"Hidup ni macam basikal eh?" or "Life is like a bicycle huh?"

Haha, dah terkemaruk dengan Nite Cycling betol nampak...

Anyway, why do I say so?

Because you can change the direction your mind is going (eg. ok let's think about school now... opps opps change direction, let's think about sleep first pleeeeeeaseee) just like you direct the handlebars and wheels.

Because you can speed up what you're doing or slow down (eg. I have 30mins more to finish this, I've got to quicken my pace!!) just like you can pedal faster or slower.

Because time never stops for you just like the wheels won't stop until the rider stops pedalling (and I guess that's when you're dead).

Yeah... I din't bother to think anymore cos I've got other things to think about (and more Ummah Films to watch tee hee!)

Bagaimana Cinta Kita Pada Rasul. Read it.

Oh no! I just remembered! Next next week is april already! Meaning DRP is starting *gulps* And I just thought I can sit back and relax...

After madrasah tomorrow, I'm gonna go crazy for awhile as a form of celebration. Then,

Monday: DT meeting
Tuesday: NC meeting
Wednesday: CCA I think
Thursday: NC prog trg
Friday: TGIF!
Saturday: CCA n NC Faci trg
Sunday: insyaAllah movie screening
Monday: DRP begins *teng teng teng*

*faints* *wakes up back* I hadn't had a proper holiday break y'know... *sniff sniff* *faints again*

Btw, I've never fainted in my life. Haha, alhamdulillah I guess

I'm so scared.... So so scared. What if I can't finish my assignments? My printer at home no ink oredi and it's ngek ngok oredi oso. How how? And I definitely can't finish the assignments in time to print at tp. Library closes at 1pm! I've got a long way to go... I've barely started. Should I write in English or Malay? Hmm, I can't decide... and my bibliography is so rabak. All internet sources. Trusted source or not oso I dunno.

Oh and hadith internet source is so hard to find! So many are corrupted opinions of the different groups of 'Islam': the Shia, the Sunni, the dunno what else. I'm a Muslim. My religion is Islam. Allah is my God and God of the whole universe. And Muhammad is Allah's messenger. And I believe in Rasulullah's companions, as well as the scholars who have contributed much to the Muslim society then and now. Qur'an is my guide. Hadith/Sunnah Rasul is my interpreter of the Qur'an. I believe Qur'an is kalamullah and it is the truth. And I do believe it is complete and applies to all of this era: Rasulullah's umat. Yet I do believe in the hadith/sunnah as well, because I believe nothing comes out of Rasulullah's mouth but the truth and none of his actions are wrong, unless Allah points it out, because eventhough Rasulullah is a highly-respected man and the best of all examples, he is still a human and humans make mistakes. Though his mistakes are immediately corrected by Allah whereas ours are not. If you then think that Imam Bukhari, Imam Muslim and all those scholars who compiled the hadiths are fake, I''ve studied their histories and the methodologies they used and I believe that if they say a certain hadith bis sahih or authentic then I shall believe so. I believe what I believe and you believe what you believe. And I believe Islam is Islam.

I just can't see why they so cannot tolerate Islam as it is. They cannot say something bad about Allah or the Qur'an, they'll say something bad about Rasulullah or the hadtiths. They cannot say something bad about Rasulullah, they'll say something bad about the scholars or their works. Irritating orientalists and opinionated people.

in the first place, why must there be all these groups of Muslims that call themselves under a different name?? I'm confused at times because of all these. It's like they've created new religions you know. They may be right in some matters, but i dunno la eh.. It's like if they go on doing whatever they believe, it's up to them la ok, but if they go on and criticise others, then it's like so politics uh. And for sure, they are making my life as a student trying to complete my assignments very hard.

I'm not saying I am right and they are wrong. For all I know, I am wrong. And I guess I'm being judgemental and am stereotyping. And therefore, I pray to Allah:

O Allah, please guide me to the right path. The path of those whom you give nikmat. Not the path of those who are at a loss or those who are lost.

I feel like I'm doing social studies all over again. Like reliability, detecting biasness and whatsoever.

Jentik sikit je and I'd have tears in my eyes and before long, my tears would be mencurah-curah. Buruk seh.

Night cycling was wonderful. It'd have been perfect if I just had a cushion as a seat, ouch ouch.

The stars in the sky was just beautiful, subhanallah... the nightsky filled with all those constellations was just too magnificent. And the sunrise... How the stars somehow disappeared and the sky grows lighter and lighter and there were hues of purple and pink and orange and blue... Wonderful. Simply wonderful...

Suddenly ngah tengok sunrise dapat pulak ilham nak tulis sajak/pantun whatever you call it. To me, it sounds like neither. It's just luahan hati...

As the sun slowly shines through
and rays push the dark clouds away
The waves lap against the shore
and the ships cover the horizon

The only words that comes to mind
were;
"Subhanallah,
Walhamdulillah,
Walailahailallah,
Wallahu akbar!"

The sight was overwhelming
that I can't help
but fill my eyes with tears.

And as I turn to reflect
I ask,
"What have I done to deserve such a gift?"
And tears flowed over the brim
as I realise
I've done nothing much
and I've been bad
and I'm still bad

I have a purpose here
We all do
I have not fulfilled mine yet
What if I were to be called back?
To rest
for many more years
before I will be reawakened
To answer for my deeds
and my wrongdoings.

Asyhadu ala ilaha ilallah
Waasyhadu anna Muhammad ar-rasulullah...

5 SYARAT SESUATU AMALAN MENJADI IBADAH


1. Niat mesti betul (kerana Allah)

2. Tidak meninggalkan perkara yang asas/wajib

3. Perlaksanaannya mesti betul (tidak melibatkan perkara haram)

4. Memberi manfaat kepada kehidupan

5. Natijahnya mesti Betul


DOA APABILA MULA BELAJAR



Ertinya: Ya Allah, bukakanlah ke atas kami hikmat-hikmat-Mu dan
limpahilah ke atas kami khazanah rahmat-Mu, wahai yang Maha
Pemurah lagi Maha Penyayang.


DOA MOHON TERBUKA HATI DAN FAHAM



Ertinya: Wahai Tuhanku, tambahkanlah ilmuku dan luaskanlah kefahamanku.
Wahai Tuhanku, lapangkanlah dadaku dan mudahkanlah urusanku. Ya Allah,
keluarkanlah kami dari kegelapan ragu dan muliakanlah kami dengan cahaya
kefahaman, bukakanlah bagi kami makrifat ilmu, berilah cahaya kepada hati kami
sebagaimana Engkau beri cahaya kepada matahari dan bulan dan mudahkanlah
bagiku pintu-pintu kurnia-Mu, wahai yang Maha Penyayang.

Taken from here.

I agree with the 5 syarat and I know the doa mula belajar is correct. The doa mohon terbuka dan dan faham, I not sure hehe.

Check this out!

Christianity hindered Scientific Progress in Europe

The eventual outcome of the struggle for power between the Church and the thinkers and philosophers was the separation of the Church and the state through a compromise solution. In this compromise deal, the authority of the Church was limited to preserving the morals in society and conducting rituals, and the state was to be run on man made laws. This compromise solution is the basis upon which the Capitalism* was founded. The separation between the Church and the state was completed by the 18th century CE, a time in history which marks the beginning of the Enlightenment period that sparked the industrial revolution in Europe.

Science Flourished under Islam

The notion that religion is at odds with scientific development is alien to Islam. History shows that most of the scientific developments by the Muslims were carried out when Islam prevailed, and not when it was forcibly removed from their lives.

The Present Situation

The Muslim world today is characterised with failure, disunity and stagnation in science and technology. Despite the fact that the Muslims have enormous wealth, they still lag behind in industrial development. How did this come about? This sad state of affairs is not the result of following Islam, rather it is a direct result of not following Islam. The constitutions and laws which prevail in the Muslim World today are derived from secular origins. That is, they have nothing to do with Islam, for they are man made constructions. When Islam prevailed as a way of life, with its own political, economic, social, educational and judicial system, Muslims and non Muslims in the Islamic state enjoyed peace and security. The development of science was simulated by the Qur'an itself and very quickly the Muslims became the leaders in the field of science and technology.

*this post is in no way any offence to Christians. I'm just reading up on history and thought I'd share what I found. Actually, it's more of a wake-up call to Muslims... Woi! You want success but you don't practice your religion, how can... Call yourself a Muslim.. Muslim by name only! No wonder there's so much problems in the malay-Muslim community in Singapore. Sad know... How I wish to see my time having a Muslim city like Damascus or Baghdad (these two were the central area of knowledge where scholars everywhere come to study at) be the central learning point, not only for Islamic studies but for all kinds of studies as well...

I.WILL.NOT.BLOG.ANYMORE.

















Nah, I love blogging too much... But it did cross my mind a lot alot since yesterday. I felt like dropping or rather throwing everything down and go into a deep long hibernation. But nah... Without my blog, I'd feel even worst. Love you bloggie dear. K I'm weird. I know. But I'm more than just weird ok.

Still feeling lethargic. All my energy have been seeped out. I almost have none left to even eat! I bought a burger last night, took two bites out of it, gave the rest to my brother and went to sleep. My idea of hibernation. Tonight, I bought a bbq honey chicken wing, ate half of it (but because I ate too much already. I purposely eat a lot tonight.) and planned to go to sleep, but couldn't resist blogging awww..

Had two unaccomplished days. I feel like a horrible failure... But guess I learned a lot, about myself basically and it doesn't sound good. Oh and I just broke 2 out of the 6 Fityan Commandments...

Don't worry, I'll pick myself up, somehow. Now don't bother me. I wanna start tonight's hibernation. Bye.

Musthalah Hadith Paper 1 was ridiculous! Paper 1 is open book and the questions are just... nonsensical! InsyaAllah boleh pass, tapi nak score tu tak yakin uh.

Haflah in the morning was pretty ok. We received 3 gifts! 1. Kiblat Compass to symbolise a sense of direction, 2. A Journal to pen down our reflections in and 3. The gift of KNOWLEDGE. Hehe. Initially when the mudirah asked, "Sape nak hadiah?" Shaza and I was like automatically "NAK!" haha. My speech bored people to death. I dunno ar maybe I was looking at the wrong people. My gaze kept catching this sweet-looking girl from another class and sweet-looking as she was, she was frowing and she had her arms folded across her chest. Okayyy nvm, it's over and done with. Oh, the valedoctorian from Hong Kah gave a short speech and something made her cry towards the end. I didn't catch what she was talking, cos like me, she was quite short and her voice wasn't properly projected through the mike. Oh, as for me, I stood on tip-toe the whole time when I stood at the podium. Haha, PENDEK!

I've got quite a lot of pics updating to do, 2nd birthday surprise, 2nd cousin's engagement, haflah and a few scenery pics, but later arh. The exam left me feeling tired, sleepy and hungry and I wanna treat myself to a book!! My mum gave me $15 to buy a book of my choice as a present for getting top student, yay! But I used up the $15 to pay for my madrasah fees. I thought $420 per sem, sekali $450, terkorek2 lah beg tu for another $30. And, my parents haven't paid me back. ater they put in my bank, so now I can't go find my book...

Nvm, I buy also I can't read yet, cos I've still got my Sejarah& Tamadun Islam II exam and my 2 5-page long (each) assignment due on next Sunday. Gosh, I feel like eating Nasi Ambeng behind Joo Chiat haha. The kuah lemak ayam cili padi extremely power!!

Oh btw, my dad attended my haflah afterall. Though on the way to Assyakirin, he was like complaining about everything under the sun, including the fact that I'm gonna give my speech in English and not in Malay, even after I exlained why I chose to do it in English. At one part, he said, "Tengoklah nanti lepas your speech orang mengata pasal kau, mentang2 top student nak buat in English taknak in Malay (eksyen gitu ar makna dia). Ni lagi buat baba taknak masuk." And I gave a very sharp reply that probably stung his ego, "Kenapa, malu??" Mwahaha I know I'm evil. Can't help it you see. Sakit hati lah seh. Fact kan, nak malu buat ape?? YOu should be proud of me! Pandang yang buruk je (not that giving a speech in English is buruk), yang baik taknak pandang. Ni lah manusia... But you my readers would understand, I'm so comfortable conversing in English. Al-maklum, kay poly mana ade Melayu lagi?? Of course, I can give a speech in fully perfect bahasa baku Higher Malay Standard if I need to (and yes my initial speech was in proper Malay, but my concept was wrong and I had to redo and somehow I found it hard to translate.) but it's so formal it'd sound like I'm reading from a script or book not written by me! And yes, there is a tip to writing a valedictory speech, it shouldn't sound like it was directly lifted from a book. It should sound personal. Dush...

Wah, lately banyak eh aku complain pasal my parents here. Dulu tak pernah, cos I remember my mum's words, "Aib keluarga jangan dibilang-bilang" such that even my best friends dunno how my family is like. But lately... Stress sangat kott. Alar it's the growing phase lah ni, mesti ada "Why can't you understand me??" phase lol. Not really buka aib keluarga, but just conflicts between a teenage daughter and her parents je. Ini merupakan satu pengajaran bagi ibu-ibu, bapa-bapa, bakal ibu-ibu, bakal bapa-bapa, remaja-remaja dan bakal remaja-remaja. Mudah-mudahan dapat avoid the mistakes my family probaly had done lar ye.

Oh, and I have this macam angan-angan ah.. You know when you post something on the net, it'd like be there forever and ever and who knows nanti bila aku pulak jadi mak orang, I can read my blog back about time-time remaja ni supaya aku tak akan buat kesilapan yang sama. And maybe kalau dorang berani, my children pon boleh read my blog jugak. Well, unless blogger decides to delete the blogs uh, or make us pay for the server (NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!). Drama mama seh entry aku.

Eh kebiasaan eh tulis panjang-panjang. Dah, aku nak pi makan pisang goreng that I'd been eyeing since just now, and then I'm off to sleep.

Oh, I think budak-budak Madrasah Perdaus bedok memang prefer to converse in English. Arif and Audi also presented the Bunayya ppt in English, and Shara and Shaza would have presented the Tafsir proj in English if they could, but the mudirah was like, "Try in Malay boleh? All of you cakap Inggeris nanti banyak parents complain pasal tak galakkan cakap Melayu. But I won't force you". I think if she could, she'd get me to give my speech in Malay as well, but I was listing all the reasons why I did in English, such that she probably thought, "Okkkkkkk, eh stop ar, KK fine you can talk in English" LOL.

Anyway, Happy 19th birthday Khairiyah!!! May Allah bless you!

It hasn't rained for 2 days. Good good. Rain these days just makes me wanna snuggle up under my comforter and go to sleep whole day long. Besides it is so troublesome to bring my umbrella around. And that umbrella is.... nevermind. I need to get myself a bigger bag and an umbrella. Soon.

Just as the sun has been shining through, my smile has been slowly shining through as well. Of course the dark clouds still hang around and cover that smile on and off.

Know why my smile is slowly shining through? Cos firstly I'm all prepared for tomorrow morning and now that Shara and Shaza have kindly accepted to help me present the Tafsir presentation and Audi too has decided to run away from his camp for awhile and help Arif present the Bunayya presentation, I can concentrate solely on my speech. And I've managed to cut it shorter so I'll only be up there on the stage (I hope not to embarrass myself) for 5 mins.

However I've yet to finish my Musthalah Hadith revision. I still have that 5 chapters I was talking about earlier. I'll chiong it out tonight, insyaAllah.

Oh btw, my dad's not staying to watch me give my speech. Don't ask.

Oh ya, another reason why I'd been smiling is cos I'd been meeting new people. Like last Thursday, I shared a of Nasi lemak with this nenek and this one Chinese-looking lady whom I normally see at Ghufran but never chatted with before. I still don't fancy chatting with the nenek long long cos I find the way she talks very 'manja'. And in my dictionary, manja doesn't exist unless it applies to ME. Hehe. But I'm not that manja larh. I find it that manjaness can be very irritating and no, I don't wish to irritate people. Though, I do feel that my voice gets a bit whiny sometimes. Tak tau camne nak tukar ar.

The chinese-looking lady, I found out is actually of mixed blood and she's actually a teacher at East View Sec teaching Bio and Chem. Haha, it was nice chatting to her. Oh and she's from TP! She took engineering but turns out to be a science teacher haha. And she told me that she only comes on Wednesdays and Thursday for the syarahan, but only after she finish marking. I think I drop by masjid on Thursdays more than on any other days (cept Tues and Sat when I have meeting and class) haha, cos really I do remember seeing her quite a lot of times before.

Anyway, yesterday I went to Perdaus Bedok to meet Ustazah Farhana and I was late, so I took a taxi (lama benar aku tak naik taxi. Mahal seh! $5.60 aku kena!! Boleh beli Mac EVM seh) and the uncle in the taxi was like, I dunno ar what he was like! But he talked as if I'm such a failure like that. Eh hello uncle, you if so smart, why drive taxi?? O level entah ada ke tak, bebual step paham je. He was like asking me how's my studies, can go uni not, I top 5 people during O level not, I got cholarship not. Wei! Dah lah pekak, aku bebual pon "Hah? Hah? Hah?", nak banyak colok pulak. Then I saw I wanna be researcher, he ask why don't want become doctor lah ape lah. Oi, suker aku ar! Irritated seh ngan uncle tu. Macam aku anak dia pulak. Serious, cara dia cakap not as a concerned taxi driver showing his concern for and give advice to and motivate a young Singaporean student to achieve greater heights in life, but cara dia macam sindir gitu. Uncle, please eh, I know very well how competitive it is in Singapore and how good I must be in order just to survive, you don't have to membebel about it in front of me. Ikut hati nak aje aku turn the tables around. But I didn't want to prolong the conversation. Then dia continue lagi! Tanya tak panas ke pakai tutup2. Abistu dia sendiri cakap, nowadays, young people don't wear like you. Abe now that I'm wearing decently like this, you're like discouraging me. Betul ar, I think he'd had such a boring day such that he wanna add some spice into everything that comes out of his mouth. Haha, Fatin would say, "Maplek betol!"

Kat dalam office Perdaus lagi satu hal. It was a weird experience haha. Cos there were two friendly asatizahs in the office and asked for my name, and when I told them my name, they're like, "Ohhhhh! Awak lah ni Marliyana!" and "Marliyana? Marliyana Mohd. Noor??". Aik? Sejak bila namaku tersebar luas nih?? Tak pernah-pernah aku bebual ngan asatizah2 nih! Cos I pay my fees using GIRO so I don't enter the office often. Only at most once a year since Sec 1 to Sec 4agaknya. Even Ustazah Farhana and Arif don't know who I am when they heard my name over the phone. Entah la eh.

Oh, then Ustazah Norliza (I think that's her name) sent me to Tampines (best best, though the aircon was blowing full blast in my face that I felt as if I've got a frozen nose when I alighted her car) and I got to know her better as well, how she ended up working at Perdaus Bedok and all. Now, she's someone who's really trying to motivate people to do better. So in a way, my ride to Perdaus is somewhat opposite of the ride back home eventhough we were on a pretty much similar topic.

Then last night had usrah at Kak Maryam's house on the topic of hijab/tudung. From all that we discussed about, I learnt two main things:

1. I was really jahil last time even though I attend madrasah and such and I am not a good person now either (though better in many ways), I haven't reached the best a Muslimah youth can be, and my iman is relly not kuat. Well, I am trying to improve. It takes time, slowly slowly start jinak-jinak, then betol2 perbetolkan diri. It's an ongoing process. Gakkan nak mendadak, my parents pon terkejot berok agaknya. And no, my family is not as religious as you may think. Neither am I dear friends. There are people out there so much better than me, and some of them are my very own sisters i've crossed paths with and I'm very glad and grateful that our path had crossed. Eh panjang pulak ceritanya.

2. There is really so much hikmah behind me not being able to enter JC cos my grades weren't good enough. I'm very glad and grateful. I really think that 2006 was a turning point in my life. Even when I read my entries from 2006, it was... dunno what to say lah, other than alhamdulillah, segala puji bagi Allah. The fasting month in 2006 especially. Truly, I'm grateful. indeed Allah knows best what's good for you and what's not.

opps, I took up too much time. Gotta go. Thanks for reading!

This is so much tougher than it seems! I spent like 1 1/2 hr just producing a 2mins speech and it's supposed to be 5-10 minutes long!!

I think I need to add more humour inside. It's so dull and boring right now. Or perhaps it's just me feeling dulled and bored with it.

That's it, I'm going to sleep... I'll continue after Subuh insyaAllah. Heck care ar, the thing is on Sunday!!

How to Calm Your Nerves

Valedictorian Speeches made easy for you


Congratulations on being asked to present the Valedictorian speech.


This is in deed an honor.


There is also a companion page at Graduation speech which outlines how to structure your Valedictorian speech.


On this page are some techniques to assist your presentation of this great speech on this auspicious occasion.


To relax and enable you to be at your best, you can calm the nerves with the steps below.

Calm the Nerves


You may want to print this page and take it with you on this excursion.


1. Be prepared
Writing your speech is not difficult. Here is a skeleton and structure to use.


2. Visualise
Visualise the occasion. To help you, visit the venue if you can where you will present the Valedictorian Speech.
The venue may be a familiar one, so a visit may not be required. But if you are super nervous, or have never stood to speak from the stage or podium at this venue, then a visit is an excellent idea. You will be surprised how this small excursion will considerably calm your anxiety.


If you cannot visit, imagine and vividly visualise those parts of the journey below that will be the same: the venue size, the audience, the sounds, the atmosphere of excitement.


Make as vivid an image as possible. Over the next few weeks and days, you will replay the steps below over and over again.

When you are at the venue …



- Sit / stand where you will walk from, or simply sit on the floor.
- Walk the path you will take out to the speaking spot. This could be a podium on the stage.

((It'll be be such a looooooooooong walk there... SECONDS WOULD FEEL LIKE EONS~!))

- When at the podium scan the space, the venue. Scan where the audience will be seated. Look around to where the dignitaries will be seated. Look at your fellow graduates.


- Note some of the detail in the space.


- Now scan these spaces again and imagine your audience.

- In your mind, populate the seats - see the faces.

- See the faces urging you on, smiling, laughing, even clapping - can you see this?


- Know that this whole audience, and the dignitaries who are most likely on stage, ALL want you to be successful.


They ALL want you to do well. They are here to hear your words.

- Just stand there and see all these people supporting you.

- See and hear them applaud as you end your Valedictorian speech.

- Return to your seat - walk from the speaking point (podium) back to where you will be sitting or standing.


- Hear the applause as you sit or return to your position.


NOTE: have no negative images or sounds or experiences in your visualisation, although make it real in your mind.

((i have been imagining myself tripping on what I wear, on my own feet or simply just falling flat on the ground for no reason))


Now, when you are away from the venue, when you are quiet, maybe sitting having lunch, maybe in the shower, maybe lying in bed, replay your tape: see the images, hear the applause, the sounds, smell the room.


Replay your visualisation as often as you like.


This successful imagery will build confidence and calm the nerves, AND create the best experience of a Valedictorian speech.


These simple steps are my proven strategy to calm the nerves. By simply walking where you will walk, and standing where you will stand, nerves dissipate not totally, but sufficiently.

To be at your best, a few nerves will aid your presentation as you become alert to the occasion, your audience and your message.


All the very best, and most important, ENJOY the occasion and have FUN !!

Yes I am getting more and more rebellious.

But I am getting more and more patient as well ok.

I bite back my tongue more than let it loose these days. And so I cry alone. Nangis sorang-sorang tak dosa, menjawab dosa k. And kalu tak salah, orang yang dianiaya (yang sedih dan pasrah dan sebagainya), doanya lebih mudah termakbul kan?

I've been pai tao-ed dunno how many times.

I have 1001 things to do and it's BARELY decreasing, and instead more and more are coming my way.

I'm tired ok. I'm so darn tired.

There's so many changes this week I'm so confused myself.

Just please let next week be a better week.

Which reminds me... ONLY contact me if you wanna have some fun rockclimbing or eating out or mosque-hopping or something fun ar. If you wanna call me to help you with a favour, or with requests, or with instructions and whatsoever, forget it, I'm not helping. I don't think I'll even go for usrah next week, cos I have 2x 5-page thesis to complete, one exam to sit for and two events to run. Oh, plus a birthday surprise to plan for. So please eh, have mercy and spare me. I'm running on a no-off-button exercise machine, yet I'm not losing any weight.

Thank you.

I'm planning to finish my speech, my two presentations and at least 5 chapters of Musthalah Hadith before I sleep. Possible? I'll give you my answer another time, maybe. That is if I don't fall dead or unconscious or ill. I'm already having a sore throat and a fever seems to be setting in and no one knows except you. Cos you are my world where my heart's and mind's contents are being poured into.

And as usual, I'm hungry. Hunger & emo doesn't go together. Oh what the heck, not everything goes together but are forced together anyway.

Oh, and thanks to those of you who have shown care and concern or at least some sympathy. You're very much treasured, cos there's not many of you around me.

I recently changed by screen background to this and I kept forgetting about it. So everytime I switch on my lappy, the feeling of surprise is still there

Received results this afternoon. Justttt woke up then I saw sms for results straightaway sat up straight and prayed for good news. In need of lotsa good news to cheer me up uhh... And...

When I saw my results, nak ketawa pon ade, nak nangis pon ade. Cos wad I expected to do better in, like confirm A, I didn't reach it. Then wad I expected to badly in, like possibility of failing, I did quite ok. In fact, I had same grades for all uh, except MBio =) Macam balanced up, and I found that funny. Oh, I did better this sem than last sem. But.. my GPA dropped sikit anyway, by 0.03, pasal I really did well for Year 1.

Bukan sengaja nak merugut ke ape. Taklah... In fact, I'm very much grateful to Allah. Cuma memang that's how I was taught uh. Kindergarten and pri 1 got first in class. Then throughout the years, decline uh jadi top 10 je, pernah tu I got 16th ish. And I will always remember what my mum told me ar. "Your dad won't sign your record book if get anything less than first." Sheesh kecik2 dah kena pressure... Dah besar, sejak dua menjak masuk poly, dapat result I don't show my parents my results anymore. Serik uh. Dapat anything else than A satu hal, dapat A pon satu hal lagi. They don't believe I can maintain good grades. I've been trying to do my best to pull up my GPA back to 3.5, if possible back to my 3.86. Tak tahu camne lah eh. Maybe after D'Talk2, I'll make sure nothing disrupts my year 3. Memang that time dah step-down Titisan and I'd like to ask to be out of NI comm (sebab, tu macam secara tak sengaja uh). Fityan maybe amek kerja senang-senang... Haha, nak out tak boleh kan... Siang-siang Ust dah pesan sesape yang dah dipilih tak boleh cakap taknak.

Ok I have lotsa things to ponder about rather than mull around feeling all the pressure on me. Gtg! I wanna be the best I can be for all the things I'm currently entasked to do, esp. my DPI!!

Yes, Islam is the only non-Christian faith, which makes it an article of faith to believe in Jesus Christ (pbuh). No Muslim is a Muslim if he does not believe in Jesus Christ (pbuh). We believe that he was one of the mightiest Messengers of Allah (swt). We believe that he was the Messiah, translated ‘Christ’. We believe that he was born miraculously, without any male intervention, which many modern day Christians do not believe. We believe that he gave life to the dead with God’s permission. We believe that he healed those born blind and the lepers with God’s permission.



Allah says in the Qur'an regarding Jesus Christ (pbuh):



And remember Jesus the son of Mary said: "O Children of Israel! I am the Messenger of Allah (sent) to you…” (Surah Saff 61:6)



Infact Islam makes it an article of faith to believe not only in Jesus Christ (pbuh) but all the Messengers that preceded and followed him. By name only twenty-five Messengers are mentioned in the Qur'an. Allah instructs us in the Qur'an:



“O you who believe! believe in Allah and his Messenger and the scripture which He has sent to His Messenger and the scripture which He sent to those before (him). And who denies Allah, His angels, His Books, His Messengers and the Day of Judgment have gone far far astray.” (Al-Qur'an 4:136)



Thus belief in the Messengers, including Jesus (pbuh) is an important belief of Islam. Though Jesus (pbuh) is mentioned by name twenty-five times in the Qur'an, he is also referred with other respectable terms such as ‘Ibne Maryam’ - son of Mary; as ‘Masih’ – translated Christ, as ‘Rasulullah’ - Messenger of Allah, as ‘Abdullah’ – servant of Allah, as ‘a word of Allah’, as ‘a spirit proceeding from Allah’, as ‘a sign of Allah’ and numerous other epithets spread over fifteen different chapters of the Qur'an.



It is also true that the Muslims, on the authority of the Qur'an and the sayings of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) believe in the second coming of Jesus Christ (pbuh). He was the only Prophet of Allah who was raised up alive. Allah says:



‘…They said (in boast) "We killed Christ Jesus the son of Mary the Messenger of Allah"; but they killed him not, nor crucified him, but so it was made to appear to them; and those who differ therein are full of doubts with no (certain) knowledge but only conjecture to follow, for of a surety they killed him not. Nay Allah raised him up unto Himself; and Allah is Exalted in Power, Wise.’(Al-Qur'an 4:157-158)



Allah mentions the second coming of Jesus Christ (pbuh) in the following verse of the Qur'an:



“And indeed, he (i.e. Jesus) will be (a sign for) knowledge of the Hour, so be not in doubt of it, and follow Me. This is a straight path.” (Al-Qur'an 43:61)



The reason why Jesus (pbuh) is the only Prophet of Allah who was raised up alive by Allah is because he was the only Prophet whose “followers” mistook him as God. They wrongly say that he claimed divinity. Thus he will come back again to this world to clarify all such misconceptions. Says Allah in the Qur'an:



‘And behold! Allah will say "O Jesus the son of Mary! did you say unto men worship me and my mother as gods in derogation of Allah"? He will say: "Glory to You! never could I say what I had no right (to say). Had I said such a thing you would indeed have known it. You know what is in my heart though I know not what is in yours. For You know in full all that is hidden.’ (Al-Qur'an 5:116)



There are no less than seventy Ahadith that speak of the second coming of Jesus Christ (pbuh). In one of the Ahadith, Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) is reported to have said:



"By Him in Whose Hands my soul is, son of Mary (Jesus) will shortly descend amongst you people (Muslims) as a just ruler and will break the cross and kill the pig and abolish the Jizya (a tax taken from the non-Muslims who are in the protection of the Muslim government). Then there will be abundance of money and nobody will accept charitable gifts.” (Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 3. Hadith no. 425)



It should also be borne in mind that Jesus Christ (pbuh), in his second coming will not be coming with any new message or revelation. Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) is reported to have said:



"How will you be when the son of Mary (i.e. Jesus) descends amongst you and he will judge people by the Law of the Qur'an and not by the law of the Gospel”. (Sahih Bukhari, Vol. 4. Hadith No. 658)



Let’s now analyse the following words attributed to Jesus Christ (pbuh) in the Bible:



"Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.” [The Bible, Mathew 7:22-24]



In the verses quoted above, Jesus (pbuh) said that in his second coming, he would ask the people to depart from him, to get away from him because he wouldn’t know them. Who are these people? The Muslims or the Hindus? The answer is neither Hindus nor Muslims but the Christians, because Muslims or Hindus do not claim to do “Miracles” in the name of Jesus Christ (pbuh) nor do they cast out devils in his name.



Thus Muslims believe in Jesus Christ (pbuh) to be one of the mightiest Messengers of Allah and also believe in his second coming.

Taken from here.

I really like the first paragraph. It's true. The last few paragraphs from the verse from the bible onwards I'm not so sure, cos I don't understand uh.

I was trying to reorganise my thoughts string by string, if only there's such a thing called pensieve, and it brings me back to the purpose I'm here. The purpose of life is to obtain Allah's pleasure (mardhatillah) and the purpose of our existence is to worship Allah. How do we do this, is by following what is in the Al-Qur'an and As-Sunnah, our two main guidance on this vast earth created by Allah long before He created us.

Perhaps, we do have another reason for our existence

I was looking for this ayat Qur'an that explains that Allah tidak mencipta sesuatu yang sia-sia, and

GOSH I'M DAMN IRRITATED RIGHT NOW I CAN'T CONTINUE WRITING. BAIK-BAIK AKU DENGAN IKHLAS NAK IKUT MY PARENTS GI SHENG SIONG JADI KENA PAKSA PULAK. CAN'T I JUST FINISH TYPING THIS????? CAN'T I DO WHAT I WANT THESE DAYS ANYMORE?? WHY MUST I KEEP FOLLOWING WHAT OTHERS WANT ME TO DO?? STOP AND LISTEN TO WHAT I WANNA SAY CAN OR NOT. Only Allah listens to what I have to say, I think. And I extremely hate it when people use my name to say something that they wanna say. Nak cakap tu cakap je larh. If it comes from you, then say it! Why must use me?? Make me look bad only. It's not once or twice ok. And yes FYI once again, I AM NOT A PUPPET WHICH PEOPLE DO WHATEVER THEY WANNA DO.

The question is, "What is the purpose of our creation? Why God created us (human beings) and this universe?"

Following is an excerpt from a lecture by Sheikh Khalid Yaseen. Khalid Yaseen is a former Christian who converted to Islam. The focus of the lecture were two things;

1. What is the Purpose of Life, and

2.Qur'an is the True Book of the True God.

He delivered this lecture to non-Muslims in Saudi Arabia, and later that night 43 people converted to Islam. That should tell you how powerful that lecture was. Below is parts of his lecture in text, and if you wish to hear the audio I have given the link as well. If you wish to hear about the Purpose Of Life, cilck on Part 1 and hear the first 20 minutes of the lecture.

Allah said to us in the Holy Quran: "And I did not create the jinn and mankind except to worship Me." [Surah 51: Ayah 56] this is what the Almighty said.

Our purpose in this life is to recognize The Creator, to be grateful to Him, to worship Him, to surrender ourselves to Him and to obey the laws that He has determined for us. It means worship is our purpose in life. Whatever we do in the course of that worship, [i.e., the eating, the sleeping, the dressing, the working, the enjoying,] between birth and death is consequential and subject to His orders. But the main reason for our creation is worship. I don't think anyone who is analytical or scientific will have much of an argument with that purpose. They may have some other reason with themselves-but that is something they have to deal with between themselves and Almighty God.

Source: Extracts from a lecture by Khaalid Yaseen

"Invite all to the way of thy Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching; And consult with them in ways that are best and most gracious." (Al Qur'an, 16:125)

It's quite long, but after I read bits and pieces of it, it's quite interesting. Read more here.

Something I'd like to quote from Ad:

it's difficult to please, but still,
nothing is impossible,
it's all about planning and doing it our best

It's true. It's definitely difficult. everyone has different opinions. Everyone insists that they're right (including yourself normally). Everyone wants it their way. Sometimes, it's someone you had felt comfortable with, but when you're put to work together, everything just goes wrong...

I'm so stressed ok! I dunno what to do! I'm a puppet whose strings are being pulled on all sides by so many different individuals! I'm like so upset lar... Even seeing the pics of the b'dae surprises Ad had for me makes me wanna cry...

Everything I do lately is wrong and it's gonna take time redoing eveything larh and time's running out!!! One due this Sunday, the other due this coming Monday, another this coming Tuesday and another 3 on next Sunday! I'm dead meat...

Along the way home earlier, as I think about my dilemma, the song 'Hikmah' came to mind and it lifted my spirits for awhile, but after switching on my comp and realising I'm just too lazy to do anything, it just made me feel down again... InsyaAllah semua ada hikmahnya... I need to stay strong and fight everything head-on! I can't afford to lose out this battle now. It's my responsibility entasked to me.

I keep feeling hungry. I'm feeling that I'm not getting what I WANT. Instead I'm doing what I need to do... Nooooo, this is wrong!!! I chose this path and I should overcome all obstacles in the way. Endurance, resilience, faith, I need you!!!

Anyway, results coming out via sms tmr. Ok, that's it, I'm really dead meat. Roasted I think... Have you ever seen a roasted meat studying for exam? Now you will. Gotta go study Musthalah Hadith. It's my last hope of accomplishing something in such an unaccomplished rainy gloomy moody emoish day/night/morning/WHATEVER!

Rasanya saya ingin menulis dalam bahasa Melayu hari ini hehe... Sesiapa yang menghadiri majlis haflah madrasah perdaus akan mengetahui sebabnya.

Saya sungguh gembira sekali pada hari ini! Saya tidak lambat menghadiri EHS briefing pada jam 10 pagi tadi dan saya diberi peluang untuk melihat kawasan dalam AS4 (TP Applied Science research center). Saya juga dapat berjumpa dengan sepurvisor saya Ms Yian dan mendapati penerangannya tentang projek DRP saya sungguh menarik sekali! Walaupun saya benar-benar tidak sabar untuk memulakan projek saya, saya rasa begitu sibuk pada bulan Mac ini. Makanya, apabila Ms Yian memberitahu bahawa kami akan bermula projek hanya pada awal bulan April, saya sungguh gembira sekali! Ms Yian sendiri menyuruh saya bergembira dan bersuka-ria selagi saya berada dalam masa cuti sekolah ini.

Selain itu, petang ini, saya akhirnya berhasil mendapatkan Diari yang saya bersusah-payah mencarinya (kesuluruhan, kurang-kurang 7 kedai telah saya lawati demi mencarinya). Walaupun saya tidak dapat membeli Diari Muslimah yang saya inginkan, saya rasa Diari Muslimin (dicetak dengan gambar daun-daun) pun memadai. Bagus juga mengambil tahu tentang ciri-ciri lelaki solehah, mudah sikit kot nak kenali calon suami huhu. Gurau sahajalah. Saya rasa saya akan meminta kak Fyza untuk photocopy beberapa mukasurat daripada Diari Muslimah-nya (yang berwarna merah jambu yang sungguh manis dan menawan sekali!). Saya tak sabar sekali untuk menulis di dalam diari saya. Sekarang saya dapat mengatur rancangan-rancangan saya dengan lebih baik lagi!

Tahniah kepada mereka-mereka di Titisan yang telah dipilih untuk menjalani "under-study posting". Amat susah sekali bagi kami komiti yang sedia ada untuk membuat keputusan dan kami amat berharap sekali bahawa keputusan kami tepat dan tidak perlu ditukar lagi. Satu pesan daripada saya selaku ASGH adalah supaya kamu dapat membezakan bilakah waktu bersuka-ria dan bilakah waktu untuk sirius dalam tanggungjawab yang diberikan. Saya akui saya sendiri tidak menjalankan tugas saya dengan baik. Saya harap kamu dapat mengambil contoh daripada Fifi dan Naza. =)

SGH: Nareeza
ASGH: Rayhana
Secretary/Treasurer: Haikal
Quartermistress: Amalina
Public Relations: Matin

Bagi yang lain yang tidak dipilih, jangan berasa hampa. Ada kemungkinan bahawa kamulah orangnya yang telah dipilih untuk mewakili Titisan di MAG main komiti. =)

P.S. Saya baru mendapat tahu bahawa saya perlu menulis kembali ucapan saya. Haha, itulah siang-siang tak cari garis pandu... Dilema wanita hahaha

Received an e-mail regarding that^ and their words were so cute! But some made you thinking larh... Like those below:




Anyway, today was quite a stressful day. The stress was super extreme in the late afternoon and at one time I just went to a corner and cried. I'm like that larh... Give me 10 minutes to cry out the stress and I'll be fine after that, insyaAllah... It feels like quite a long time since I cried out of stress. Oh well, that's good.

The day got better after I'd cried and by night-time I was laughing away with my NC Prog Team members (and some of the times they were laughing at me, esp. how I eat my McSpicy and how I talk with my hands dirty) though I got frustrated at times when they kept losing focus and making a joke out of everything. But I feel that today's meeting was fruitful larh. Everything on the agenda was fulfilled, deventhough initially I told them we'd skip the last point if we don't have time. It is not really my character, but if I have to, I would push someone till the tasks (in this case: agenda) is done. It was 10pm when I really started to push them and by 11pm, it's done, alhamdulillah...

Eh, today 'A' level results out right? I hope all my JC friends are satisfied with your grades. If you're not happy with it or thought that you could have done better, JUST FORGET IT, IT'S OVER, IT's MEANT TO BE! Someday, somehow, by God's will, you'll be glad for it... I went through that for 'O' levels... Cheer up aite! Always look on the bright side of life!

Ok I have to update the NC comm on programmes...

Oh btw, received a call from Ustazah Aishah, *gulps*, she says I have to do a valedictorian thingy. If you don't know what that is, you have 2 choices: 1) check the dictionary 2) trust me and believe that it's some Victorian stuff uh ;)

I neeeeeeed an organizer very very soon before I breakdown again!! I need to get organized and focus on one thing at a time!

Ad, you cheeky girl!!! Dunno how many times she cheat me haha. Ask me accompany her see dentist to remove her braces la, her appointment postponed to 3.25pm la, missed eating pizza hut student meal la, her mum called la... Aiyo, turns out?

There was another surprise birthday celebration for me! This time with sweetie-pie Yuvarani and long-time-no-see-dearie Nisa! Yuva and Nisa even bought me a really lovely chocolate cake!

Lol Ad... No wonder you insisted asking me to wait OUTSIDE pizza hut (what if I'd insisted on going in to book seats first??), no wonder you wear so pretty, no wonder you talk to your "mum" in hushed tones, no wonder you didn't bring so many things, no wonder you past the seats for two people and rushed straight in! OMG! Ad... Ad... Haha suka eh.

Anyway, she looks real pretty without braces and in orange shirt haha. Yuva is sooo sweeet, never did I imagine this at all. And Nisa, miss you loads girl!!!

Wish Yuva could stay longer for our camwhoring session at TM open space, but she wanted to go Church...

Let the pics do the talking! When I finish uploading them on slideshow lar haha...

Anyway, met Fahmi and Nadia. Fahmi's uniform was so straight and neat! Haha, prim and prissy boy lol. Jk ehk.

Oh, something about the title... We were chased out twice... Haha, firstly at pizza hut cos we sat there for like 3-4 hrs oredi, and secondly at the interactive TV room for kids! Nisa read that the room is for children above 12 and it tyurns out to be for children 12 yrs and below lar! We spent quite some time inside though. I think the security guard initially thought that we were guardians to these 3 cute little kids: Syazwan, Nasyitah and Sufyan. Haha, they so cute larh!!!

Lappie from my family.


Sling bag from Khala.


Bonia wallet and Follow Me Perfume from Auntie.


Haha, souveniour from Seoul Garden.


Handbag from Khairiyah.


Ozozo handbag from Jun & Fathi.


Hehe cute personalized frame with our picture from Chloe.

Also... These next few photos are not presents larh...


DVD I wanna watch :(


Book I HAVE TO read. Exams in 10 more days only!


Book I wanna read! This is the book I'd been wanting for quite some time and finally I own it hehe.

I read two books since school closed: "Urgent Message of Wowness" and "The Royal Diaries: Kazunomiya, Prisoner of Heaven Japan 1858"

Ler... My mum ajak gi makan breakfast kat Istanbul... Malas!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lol

Ish, malam2 buta ni baca script pulak. Haha syiok sendiri lah pulak. Sampai record voice sume! Lol. Kalau our play ni jadi drama radio kat Warna 94.2 yang on Sunday morning tu mesti gerek. Haha... Fifi and Hid always come up with wonderful scripts. Myself, I feel like I have no part in Titisan haha. Takde talent uh... responsibilities I have also are not carried out, hai... I make a better PR I think.

Saw this song at Zakiah's multiply and a set of memories flashed through my mind... Missing the old peeps...



And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of the night in June
I Didn't know much of love, but it came too soon
And There was me and you, and then it got real blue
Stay at home talkin' on the telephone and
We would get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

Chorus:
As we go on, we remember
All the times we had together
And as our lives change, from whatever
We will still be, friends forever

So if we get the big jobs and we make the big money
When we look back now, will that joke still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels

Repeat chorus

La, la, la, la; yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la, we will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there? Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

Repeat chorus 3x

All the best for your 'A' level results this Friay dear friends... I do remember you, always. =) Visit 4R webby here and 4R blog here... I made the webby a loooong time ago! Semangat ehk? Btw don't bother reading the tag on the class blog. It's all spam messages larh... Wish I remember the password. I know it has something to do with Chemistry! Haha.

Titisan will always be funny no matter how serious it is supposed to be. Haha, we have an upcoming performance at some CC far far away soon and so there were auditions today. Dush! Betol seh kata Fifi, orang buat 'Spoof!' lepas show dah over. ni audition belum lagi selesai korang dah buat 'Spoof!' Haha, ape dah...

Disappointed at the turn-out today though. Asal korang semua tak datang nie?? Dah lah tak reply our announcement message. Aiyayai...

Did you know that TP looks stunning when it rains in the evening? Heheh... Oh this reminds me of the 'Muslim-in-Campus' camp that is gonna be conducted by the Sec 4 Perdaus Madrasah students in 9 more days!! I really feel it is a good idea to have this. So korang-korang yang baru lepas 'O' level tu atau nak amek 'O' level this year, silalah sign up eh. InsyaAllah it'd be helpful. Wish there was something like this in my time hehe.

Assalaamu'alaikum


Took your "O" or "N" Levels last year?
Or are you taking it this year?

If you are 15-18 years old,
come join us as we prep you for life post-secondary!

Learn to be an active member of your school community
whilst holding on to your Muslim identity!

Muslim In Campus
a camp for Muslim students going to post-secondary institutions

Happening in and around Masjid Assyakirin
Saturday 15 March to Sunday 16 March 2008

Only $15 Per Person
$12 per person (Perdaus student / child of Perdaus staff)

Visit our website here for details.

Muslim In Campus is a project by Madrasah Perdaus, and is supported by Saff-Perdaus.

Sorry I'm too lazy to post up the poster hihi..

I was trying to find the meaning of the 99 Names of Allah to put as a link under my imeem icon to make up for not being able to put up the wonderful video, when I foun a website talking about the uses og the 99 Names of Allah. I found a book on it at a bookstore also, but there was no source... This website quotes 3 sources, though I'm not sure how reliable they are larh and there doesn't seem to be any ayat Al-Qur'an or Hadiths quoted... But I'd link to link it up here for you to view it. There is another link to cross-refer to here.

I have put a link to the youtube video and another to the meanings (with pictures as well as ayat Al'Qur'an!) of the 99 Names below the imeem icon btw.

Just something to add from this website:

Passages from the Qur'an on the
Asma al-Husna
The 99 Names of God

And God's alone are the attributes of perfection; invoke Him, then, by these, and stand aloof from all who distort the meaning of His attributes.
Al A'Raf 7:180, tr. Asad

Say: "Invoke God, or invoke the Most Gracious:
by whichever name you invoke Him,
He is always the One -- for His are all the attributes of perfection."
Al Isra 17:110, tr. Asad

Allah is He, other than Whom there is no other god;
Who knows both what is hidden and what can be witnessed;
He is the Most Compassionate and Merciful.
Allah is He, other than Whom there is no other god;
the Sovereign, the One, the Source of Peace,
the Guardian of Faith, the Preserver of Security,
the Exalted, the Compelling, the Supreme.
Glory be to God, beyond any associations.
He is Allah, the Creator, the Evolver, the Bestower of Form.
To Him belong the Most Beautiful Names:
Whatever exists in heaven and earth declares His Praise and Glory.
And He is Exalted in Power, the Wise.
Al Hashr 59:22, tr. Helminski

I miss my blogging!!! Been busy with this meeting and that meeting for the past two days... I'm buried up to eye level with so many things to do right now, that I kept forgetting to call Ms Lee regarding the DRP *gulps*

Tell me I'm crazy. I probably am haha. Anyway, I'm not hear to blab on that. That's for me to figure out how to balance things out. (Though friendly advice and suggestions are welcomed of course =))

I had NI meeting at Saff Centre, Bukit Gombak on Monday morning. 10am tau. As to not to be late, I left house at 8.30am, so the MRT ride was still packed with people trying to get to school (poly) and work uh. And because I saw that Mas selamat poster everywhere, I kept wondering what if he were to be on the same train... Then I laughed at myself lar, cos why in the world would a fugitive be taking a train ride?? But then at Kembangan or Eunos station, the MRT didn't move off after closing it's doors tau. It opened the doors back, then closed, then opened... And there were two MRT officials running about. I was like, "Oh no, is he really on board??" But rest assured, no he wasn't. And I laughed at myself again.

Haha, this Mas Selamat case is making a kiasu Singaporean like me paranoid. It is like those SARS and bird flu times you know.. Perhaps a terrorist IS comparable to someone with a deadly virus. Afterall, both can cost the lives of many people. Btw, I took Applied Microbiology this sem right, and one topic mentions about bird flu. Let me find my paper and type out what is written...

Is the next influenza pandemic coming? YES!
When? DON'T KNOW.
Can it be prevented? PROBABLY NOT.
Can it be controlled? HOPEFULLY.
Are we prepared now? NO!
Will be be prepared then? HOPEFULLY.

Wow, have fun preparing friends...

Anyway, continuing with my MRT early morning long-distance train ride experience... You know it gets crowded right, and you probably don't get to sit... There was one time I was leaning against the 3-pole pillar deep in thoughts and then I straightened myself up for awhile larh. I know I'm short lar ok. But get this.. I am short enough to be under someone's arm while holding onto the top railing (I didn't really notice whether it was the railing or the hanging hand bars he was holding onto. I hope it's he former!) Like what the!! And if the train had stopped abruptly for one reason or another, I could easily have fallen into this mat salleh's armpit lah ok. Sheesh!

On that day I was wearing Saff shirt, cause practically I had nothing else to wear that would seem NEW. I'd been wearing the same few shirts over and over again ok! And I've yet to get over the fact that my malicious black cat by the name of Malice has hopped into my clothes cabinet and comfortably snuggled inside such that I do not want to wear anything from inside it... Besides I was heading towards Saff Centre eventhough it was for NI meeting and not Saff meeting haha. Anywayyyyyy back on track... You know the Saff shirt has the motto (or whatever you call it) on the sleeves right... Mine is in English saying "Together we mould the best in youths". Fulamak, the motto is already so motivating. Then there was something which happened that made me proud of myself. And I happened to look at my reflection in the glass pane and when I saw the words on my sleeve, I smiled. I do hope I'm slowly being moulded into one of the best youths. A looong way to go but not impossible! I am erm... JUST 19. Hehehee..

Can;t wait for the Nasi britani my mum is buying. Hungry, hungry I am hungry, table table here I come! Lol, I can never forget that song from Sec 1 or 2 music lesson lol.

I am loving my blog *big big grin*. There are still some edits to do like my list of links and the post divider which had never appeared but I know it is in the html! And I really want my blog to play Sami Yusuf's Asmaul Husna and not The Fikr's Wanita Shalihah song... Speaking of wanita shalihah, hmm... it is tougher than it seems to be a wanita shalihah... We'll strive together, right sisters? InsyaAllah...

I feel like adding those BIG emoticons to my sidebar cos everyday there is one distinct feeling or another and the only place I say it is on my MSN optional message bar haha. I was feeling quiet yesterday... I came across these btw.

I have to keep reminding our purpose of life... It is very easy to forget, even with the constant reminders I get during NC meetings every Tuesdays. Macam, hati ni belum tegas tentang niat lah... Haha, one reason why I choose 'Journey of Purpose' as the title of this blog. To keep reminding myself haha.

Poly results next week. *shrieks!*

Btw, do you think red and black is my colour?

Case satu malam tak tido revamp my bog ni, dah rasa tak sedap badan... *Achooooo!*

I must be lucky to have talked to two of our sisters who'd gone to Syria for further studies! On friday night, sis Khadijah joined in our usrah for a short while over the phone, and I managed to pesonally tell her how touched I really am with her gesture! Just moments ago, I chatted with Sis Hida over MSN. So nice to hear that they're doing just fine =) Take care my dear sisters... May Allah protect you always and grant you what you seek for... =)

I'm feeling ZOMG and !!! Entahlah, this week seemed to have zoomed past that I'd been left looking so blur like soting. (How did they associate blurness with sotong anyway??)

Finally after sooooooo long, I went to netball training and I was horrible! stamina takde, can't catch the ball properly, can't throw properly, can't attack, can't defend... Sry babes...

At night, there was movie screening of 'The Message' at Ghufran afterwhich I hung out with Jun and Fathi at Mac. These 2 arh... Haha, well...

Not much fun today. But I need time to consolidate stuff and get things in order.