There's so many things to blog about!!!

First and foremost, exam is O-V-E-R!! 1 3/4mths break woohoo! Celebrated simply with Jamie just now. Haha, bought bubble tea, go kfc, go library.. If there's more time, I'd v much like to play at the playground!

But somehow, a few hours ago, all the excitement of holidays is gone. I'm like in a pool of misery and I dunno y! Okok, so actually I do know why lah but I just fee mcm, "Marl, that's so pathetic of u to think that way!" Oh well, I don't think the mind controls the feelings. Maybe it can, but my mind don't feel like it lol.

My parents bertekak sikit tadi and... I was the reason. Feel so bad lar..

Anyway, due to exams, I missed Nisfu Syaaban at Ghufran! It was like a family gathering for Fityan family and everyone seemed to have been there, except me... And I don't think I'm missed. (Hah, pathetic kan.)

I missed Saff recce oso. Would have been a great day with all those activities lined up. Oh well, insyaAllah I'll get more involved after this all the way till the event day and till it ends. :)

Going back to TMS tomorrow. I miss my peeps sooooo much! But practically all the peeps are in JC and so they're preparing for A levels currently, which means all I get from them is: "Umm, see first arh", "Maybe I going, not confirmed", "No lah, I'm not going back, gotta study", "For what??" Sheesh... I actually planned what know.. I wanted to go TMS and join the flag-raising and watch all the performances and all you know. But, no one wanna do it with me. So, plan cancelled. Instead I'm sticking to my initial plan, which is to go cycling with Ad and co! I'm looking forward to it. I'm gonna be their guide lol. Bagus jugak la, since I'm probably the slowest rider among all, I'm pretty sure. Just that, my time management must be precise. Cos I gotta be at TMS around 1pm. Actually I have NI 'meeting' tomorrow but.. Heh heh heh...

Anyway, I was walking home from somewhere a few days back and I was thinking of what questions should I ask if I were to make a friend test. I had a very good laugh over it! People don't know my full name *cough*certakutakdenamebapakhehe*cough* People dunno how many siblings I have. People dunno which sec school was I from. People dunno wic flower I like. People dunno what's my hobby. People dunno what's my fav colour (actually ni aku sendiri confused). People dunno the reason behind my e-mail add. People dunno what's the meaning of my blog name. People dunno my fav drink. People dunno my fav animal. People dunno my fav hangout. People dunno my birthday! It's a bit saddening, like korang... *sobs* but whatever la kan. But sometimes I like oso, I mean, ni hak aku ape hal nak tau? Ceh.. Lol.

I keep hearing gurlfrens chatting sampai larut mlm sampai pagi about everything under the sun (there's a lot a girl can talk about haha). I heard friends having outings. I saw cousins hanging out together. I have heard a lot. Alhamdulillah, syukur kepada Ilahi aku bisa mendengar, aku bisa lihat. But I wonder, where do I fit in? Sometimes I regard someone very close but it turns out he/she never regard me as one as well. It's fine lah, but cuma rasa macam, org tak heran pasal kau la, buat pe kau heran pasal org. Dorang kata menyebok je dia ni, agaknya... I know there are times when I'm in my own world. But, that itself is a reason right? But I gotta say, I thank Allah for the wonderful friends He has surrounded me with, those who would berjuang together with me.

Oh yah, I just feel like joining some competitions. There are 2 Malay cerpen competition, one for BH and one for tv, which I'm really excited about. Ade lah idea sikit2, tapi ilham sepenuhnya belum tiba la. I wanna try writing sequel to one of Juliet Marillier's book I read a few days before exams lol. I feel like drawing/paintin walaupun I know it'll turn out super buruk. I gave up on sajak and poetry and all that. Haha, aku sedar diri... Then I wanna play netball, play badminton, play swing pn jadi lol. And I wanna visit beautiful places and take lots of pics (with Jun's cam ;)) And I wanna read a lot a lot. Sacrificed that last sem. I only read 1 or maybe 2 books ONLY! I sacrificed a lot last sem, because of.. Adelah kan. I ought to, but I realise I'm not willing, never was and never will.

Ape lagi eh aku nak blog about? Entah la, guess it's time to sleep! Tomorrow 8.30am gotta be a Ad's house and you know how long bus 38 route is.

Haiz... Why am I wallowing in self-pity??

P.S. So fun play hexic again!! Thx Ad!! Best score 110 000 ++ ok.. I happy readi.