There's so many things to blog about!!!

First and foremost, exam is O-V-E-R!! 1 3/4mths break woohoo! Celebrated simply with Jamie just now. Haha, bought bubble tea, go kfc, go library.. If there's more time, I'd v much like to play at the playground!

But somehow, a few hours ago, all the excitement of holidays is gone. I'm like in a pool of misery and I dunno y! Okok, so actually I do know why lah but I just fee mcm, "Marl, that's so pathetic of u to think that way!" Oh well, I don't think the mind controls the feelings. Maybe it can, but my mind don't feel like it lol.

My parents bertekak sikit tadi and... I was the reason. Feel so bad lar..

Anyway, due to exams, I missed Nisfu Syaaban at Ghufran! It was like a family gathering for Fityan family and everyone seemed to have been there, except me... And I don't think I'm missed. (Hah, pathetic kan.)

I missed Saff recce oso. Would have been a great day with all those activities lined up. Oh well, insyaAllah I'll get more involved after this all the way till the event day and till it ends. :)

Going back to TMS tomorrow. I miss my peeps sooooo much! But practically all the peeps are in JC and so they're preparing for A levels currently, which means all I get from them is: "Umm, see first arh", "Maybe I going, not confirmed", "No lah, I'm not going back, gotta study", "For what??" Sheesh... I actually planned what know.. I wanted to go TMS and join the flag-raising and watch all the performances and all you know. But, no one wanna do it with me. So, plan cancelled. Instead I'm sticking to my initial plan, which is to go cycling with Ad and co! I'm looking forward to it. I'm gonna be their guide lol. Bagus jugak la, since I'm probably the slowest rider among all, I'm pretty sure. Just that, my time management must be precise. Cos I gotta be at TMS around 1pm. Actually I have NI 'meeting' tomorrow but.. Heh heh heh...

Anyway, I was walking home from somewhere a few days back and I was thinking of what questions should I ask if I were to make a friend test. I had a very good laugh over it! People don't know my full name *cough*certakutakdenamebapakhehe*cough* People dunno how many siblings I have. People dunno which sec school was I from. People dunno wic flower I like. People dunno what's my hobby. People dunno what's my fav colour (actually ni aku sendiri confused). People dunno the reason behind my e-mail add. People dunno what's the meaning of my blog name. People dunno my fav drink. People dunno my fav animal. People dunno my fav hangout. People dunno my birthday! It's a bit saddening, like korang... *sobs* but whatever la kan. But sometimes I like oso, I mean, ni hak aku ape hal nak tau? Ceh.. Lol.

I keep hearing gurlfrens chatting sampai larut mlm sampai pagi about everything under the sun (there's a lot a girl can talk about haha). I heard friends having outings. I saw cousins hanging out together. I have heard a lot. Alhamdulillah, syukur kepada Ilahi aku bisa mendengar, aku bisa lihat. But I wonder, where do I fit in? Sometimes I regard someone very close but it turns out he/she never regard me as one as well. It's fine lah, but cuma rasa macam, org tak heran pasal kau la, buat pe kau heran pasal org. Dorang kata menyebok je dia ni, agaknya... I know there are times when I'm in my own world. But, that itself is a reason right? But I gotta say, I thank Allah for the wonderful friends He has surrounded me with, those who would berjuang together with me.

Oh yah, I just feel like joining some competitions. There are 2 Malay cerpen competition, one for BH and one for tv, which I'm really excited about. Ade lah idea sikit2, tapi ilham sepenuhnya belum tiba la. I wanna try writing sequel to one of Juliet Marillier's book I read a few days before exams lol. I feel like drawing/paintin walaupun I know it'll turn out super buruk. I gave up on sajak and poetry and all that. Haha, aku sedar diri... Then I wanna play netball, play badminton, play swing pn jadi lol. And I wanna visit beautiful places and take lots of pics (with Jun's cam ;)) And I wanna read a lot a lot. Sacrificed that last sem. I only read 1 or maybe 2 books ONLY! I sacrificed a lot last sem, because of.. Adelah kan. I ought to, but I realise I'm not willing, never was and never will.

Ape lagi eh aku nak blog about? Entah la, guess it's time to sleep! Tomorrow 8.30am gotta be a Ad's house and you know how long bus 38 route is.

Haiz... Why am I wallowing in self-pity??

P.S. So fun play hexic again!! Thx Ad!! Best score 110 000 ++ ok.. I happy readi.

Firstly, before I start yakking, there's something I wanna say which I forgot in my last post: Thank you deariez for turning up at TP's restaging of Privisi: Pagar!! I didn't know so many of you would turn up. Lurve y'all! Hope you girls enjoyed the performance and most importantly, learned something from it. =)

Ok, today's paper was fine. I love MGen!! Hehe.. Friday's AIMM was a killer, gonna pull my GPA down rabak. FPath tomorrow. Haven't really started but it's only a few topics and Dr Khin has helped us to focus on what's important and what's not. Hopefully tomorrow's paper will be just as fine as just now. I need my A's!!! Lol. But as Jun says, hope alone is not enough.

Anyway, I was so pissed off at this one bus driver just now. I was already sooo damn sleepy, I hardly slept last night studying for MGen (but it was definitely worth it lar), then I had to wait so long for the bus. Then, you know how it is when you go up front but the bus stops so far away from you and you have to turn back to board the bus. So paiseh right? To top it up, when I board the bus, the bus driver was grinning at me!! Wah lau, purposely or what seh...

Exams are making me miss out on great activities. There was Majlis Tahlil Jamak at Ghufran today and there's a SAFF reccee tomorrow and I can't go coz I need to mug!!!

I can't wait till exams are over!! Nearly 1 3/4 mths break, woo hoo!! And around 2 wks before puasa, I wanna read puas2. My Harry Potter and the Deathly Harlows!! Anybody kind enough to lend me? ;) Then comes Ramadhan, what a fine month, I'll try to help out at Ghufran as often as possible. I pray that it'll be a more worthwhile month this year! After Ramadhan comes raya!!! I'm soo going out ad enjoy ok.

Something nearer to look forward to... Going cycling with Ad and co this Friday morning. Actually dah confirm, but I wanna change plans. I wanna go back TMS and meet up with my mugger JC friends! Lol jkjk. And this Sun, I'm hoping Jun is free.. Gerl, I wanna date you!!

Ok, for now, let's return back to earth (literally I was floating on Cloud 9 since 4pm haha). FPath. Biochem II. PCT. Wish me luck!

This next time then, all the best to all facing exams!! :)

I feel so stressed since last night. You may be thinking, of course la next week is the start of sem exams already! But, that's not entirely true. That kinda stress I can manage. Come on la, you face it every year...

Whatever I say is wrong. That I cannot accept. Ok, I admit I'm a very egoistic person but at least I respect people's opinion, on the account that they respect mine. But when I get downright criticised, I go into my defensive mode. Like hey, will you listen to what I wanna say?? All you're doing is just hearing. And never accepts. I'm a human, not a robot. I give, and I wanna take as well. I can't keep on giving and giving. I won't have anything left at the end!!

There are times when I just regret doing certain things. Regret to the core.

I remember two things though, I am here to obtain keredhaan Allah, not keredhaan manusia and what is fated to happen, will happen. It's just how I react to situation. The thing is, there are certain people who only when they redha, can we get Allah's keredhaan. Paham2 jelah eh.

The one day today I felt so down and depressed. Not to add tired and aching. O Allah, once again I pray to you to grant me strength to face whatever obstacles you put in my way.

Exams coming very soon. Time flies, sooooooo fast! I hope I do well for my exams. It's a very tough sem with 5 heavy subjects. Dear friends, do pray for me too yea?

I'm reminded of a conversation I had with Naza, Fifi, Hid and Nareeza a few days back. I am a person who study hard. I don't mind people who study smart, as long as they don't try to be smart with me. Not that I'm selfish la, but I just want fairness.

Hai, dah jadi hari2 pulak eh aku blog? Hehe..

As the title suggests, had full dress rehearsal at TAPAC juz now. This time we didn't do it in the Black Box as we normally do. Instead we did it outdoors cos most likely our PPP restage will be outdoors this Thursday and so the casts need all the voice projection practice they can get even if it means no air-con and chairs.. Demi memperjuangkan teater Melayu! Chebah macam paham!

So anyway, bila dah kat luar tu, crews duduk sekelompok kepanasan boring2 lah kan, mulalah kerenah satu persatu...

Naza nak dengar radio, nak tengok tv, campak gula2 kat orang. Suhaila botol air bocor. Nadiah entah eh, SM mesti nak kena maintain ah kot hehe. Jamil main dengan Barbie dolls ala2 wrestling sampai terdedah2 aurat Barbie doll ku, eh salah Fatin nye :P Suhaimi pon tumpang sekaki.

Cast kita pon asyik ketawa plak. Sepatah Nadiah kata, ape kata Thursday ni 1hr kitorang nye performance dengan Q&A then the next hour kitorang tunjuk bloopers and blunders? Haha, rosak Taman Warisan nye Malay Arts Festival!!

Btw, do drop by Taman Warisan (beside Sultan Mosque) this Thursday night 8-10pm for our performance aite? It's in Malay and English, really good storyline (6/9 awards beb!) and it's free! Most likely our performance will last for an hour only instead of the 2hrs stipulated on the program sheet or whatever it is.

Had fun again today, tease orang lagi, but orang lain this time hehe. Then, Jamie kept trying to absorb my knowledge by putting her hand on my head. Woitz, I know lar I short! :D We challenged brisk-walking to the Engineering School bus stop to take 69. Oh, and not forgetting John! And Jack and Jill and Jane lol!

On the way back from TAPAC, Naza and Hid did an impromptu entertainment being 2 women who hafta share 1 husband (madu). It was so funny lar! Hid dengan muka2 dia! Haha! And guess who their husband is? Jamil! Aka Naza's sourplum and Hid's sugarsweet or something like that hehe.

Kk, dah dah gotta go study and sleep. Gees, I haven't pray!!! Nite nite!

I love teasing people!! Hehe, bukan nye selalu.. (Erm... I hope?)

I was being a moron couple with Jamie juz now huhuhu. :D Guess what? Ad was sitting at the taxi stand waiting for her mum. She was studying and kept looking for her mum's van. What she didn't notice is two morons jumping up and down waving at her across the main road!! And that's Jamie and me hehe. Actually it started when we waved goodbye at her from the bridge on our way out of school and she didn't notice. Then when we returned from the bubble tea shop to the bus stop, Ad was still at the taxi stand, so we decided to wave AGAIN eventhough it's 90% chance she can't see us haha. We waved till we missed our bus okaes..

Looking forward to more fun times with my gurlfwens! As Ad say, gurlfwens make us feel better! Guys may not be trusted. :P

Anyway, I notice my dad has been improving a lot, alhamdulillah.. He has lessened the number of butts he smoke and he try not to smoke in front of me. :) Yeah, I HATE the smoke smell. It's so choking kaes. Aart from that, I also see that my dad is more patient with us. I see him smiling more often. And he always seems to give in to us. Been very sweet! He even bought me the MP3 I'm using now as well as a lot a lot new clothes and pants hehe I loike!

Tapi... My mum pulak keep nagging these few days. She still find me... hmm how do I describe all of it? I have no idea lah. But I'm her confidante, and even though kekadang tu penat jugak dengar dia cakap pasal ni pasal tu, but alhamdulillah... I'm glad she tells me about all of it, at least I know :)

Kk, I gotta go study lar. Been slacking a lot these days and there's only 11 days left to semestral exams!!! Reminds me of my O level period, it was just like this... And I didn't do well for my exams. I don't want history to repeat itself. O Allah, please guide me and instil in me the importance of ilm'. Dear friends, do encourage me to go study yeah. This sem is the worse and I need all the encouragement I can get to keep going.

I was on my way to school when I noticed that there are so few houses that put up the Singapore flag! Where's the spirit of patriotism I see on the TV screen last night? Don't tell me that only those who went to the parade and only a few others are Patriotic? I mean I'm not saying that by putting up the Singapore flag is a sign of patriotism of the people in the house. But it's just a practice that shows Singaporeans are celebrating her birthday with her.. At least it is to me..

I hear my school playing the NDP songs through the PA system for the past few weeks. I see some of my mosque friends doing the cross-stitch for the nation, paid by the mosque. I read the newspaper which featured this grandma who was proud to be part of the NDP 07 as one of those taking the pledge. I came across the article about this taxi driver who pasted so many stickers of the Singapore flag and put up a few more smaller flags on his taxi. I know a few people who went for the NDP Preview and the NDP and there are a few who are participants of the grand event too.

Many celebrated Singapore's birthday, but not all. Sad to say, some just couldn't care less.

Singapore has grown, in size (from 640+ to 690++), in education (so many people are getting the opportunity to obtain their doctorate that it's getting more common), in economy (GST rise anyone?), in arts (we have the Esplanade, the Victoria Theatre, the Arts House, NAFA and whatever else I've never come across before) and in a lot more other ways. Are the people growing WITH Singapore? Or are they just growing IN Singapore, with the hope to migrate when they have the money?

I dunno why I feel sad about this. Not many seems bothered by it. Why should I? Maybe this is what is going through the minds of Singaporeans...

Call yourself a Singaporean, show that you're one and be proud of it. Hmm, what if we make this next year's NDP slogan? Haha, whatever Marl...

Bussing off to do Biochem.. Dang, I've got school...

Tak kering gusi!! In school, Ad and Jamie cheered my afternoon and then at Ghufran Jun, Fathi and some of the syababs brightened my late afternoon and evening!

Went to school early today even though I only have a 1hr PCT lect at 1pm 'cause Kayathree and Yuva wanted my help for MGen. Ad also said she wanted to join us. In the end, I studied alone from level 1 at AS to level 4 sleeping corner at library to level 4 study tables at library. Twice I fell asleep haha, once at the sleeping corner and once at the study tables. Aiyoh! Buruk!

So anyway, after PCT, Ad, Jamie and I couldn't make up our mind where to go. Ad wanted to go home to have lunch but she's too tired to walk to the East Gate bus stop to take no. 5 and she don't want to waste bus fare by taking bus from the main gate bus stop to the East Gate bus stop. So I suggested she fly. Then we saw this cleaning machine in front of the AS office and she was suggesting driving it instead!

Haha, in the end her mum called her saying she'd pick her up. So while waiting, the three of us stood atthe main gate entrance near the 'mushroom'. A lot of crap came from us haha! Zebra la, John la.. And there's this once, Jamie was saying Ad's necklace have 3 hearts while hers only have 2. I exclaimed tat I have none and Ad pointed out the big red IKEA heart stuck to my bag since Saturday lol! I totally forgot about that la..

When Ad went of, with more jokes about 'John', Jamie and I wet to buy bubble tea, stopping to look at fishes and toads and tadpoles and worms and centipedes and whatever else along the way, eww! In case you're wondering, we looked at those at the aquarium shops nearby lar.. Oh ya, on the way to the shops, we saw this bush with one extra long branch was reaching for the sky. And we joked that Jack, John's brother will be climbing it! On our way back to school, I suddenly had a hiccup attack. Sheesh! I hate it. And it was odd laughing while hiccuping 'cause Jamie was making jokes about the hiccups as well lol. When we passsed the mushroom, we saw this guy who was sitting at the same place since Ad, Jamie and I were talking there earlier. We named him Jo haha.

At Ghufran, Jun and I teased Fathi. Haha poor girl but it was fun. No hard feelings yeah Fathi. It's purely to brighten up your and our day jek kk. Then the Syababs joined us and there were even more jokes especially from Zik. Sejak 2 menjak kena call untuk NS ni kan, Zik macam ape haha. Those waiting for NS have to fill in this form and I'm sure the questions are perfectly sensible and logical to the admin staff there but Zik and Acit were so funny haha.

Zik: Agak2 ape size kepala aku?
Acit: Aku rasa XL.. Biar aku measure *covers Zik's head with both hands* Tak ar, aku rasa M.

Hahakz ape je! Pastu Zik entah masuk 'wali' mane entah (wali soldier WWII kot), payung dia jadikan senapang, botol air kathira dia jadikan bom, spray air freshener dia jadikan harmful gas nye tank (dia spray punya la banyak! kalau bau sedap takpe jugak ni air freshener ape entah busuk!) dan macam2 lagi la dia ni!

Hilmi pon lagi satu. Entah ape dia membebel kat kitorang. Awak, suara awak tu pelan, tudung kita ketat, tak dengar la! Then the guys sume asyik2 halau we girls suruh balik haha. Kalau boleh memang nak balik! Tapi ada kerja lar! Mmm, which reminds me, look out for photo updates on the Fityan board yea? Hee..

Haha, another nice day spent with wonderful people Allah sent to be my friends. May tomorrow, and the next day and the next next day and the next next next day and so on be just as nice, if not better! InsyaAllah!

If only I'm able to upload my day's events as it is from my mind into this space... Haha, as if!

K la, I'm super tired... Better go eat, and study and SLEEP! InsyaAllah we'll meet again soon :)

There are others who add colours to my life from school, Fityan, Titisan, Perdaus, Nur-Ikhwan, VE whom I consider members of an extended family and of course my own family. Not forgetting my pri sch and kindergarten friends like Amel, Mas, Iyl and Ella... And so, this entry is dedicated to them as well larh.

A friend is one who knows us, but loves us anyway. -- Fr. Jerome Cummings

Remember, the greatest gift is not found in a store nor under a tree, but in the hearts of true friends. -- Cindy Lew

Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same.-- Anonymous

A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.-- Walter Winchell

Friends are needed both for joy and for sorrow. -- Samuel Paterson

To my Muslim friends,

“The Mu’minoon are but a single Brotherhood.” (The Holy Qur’an, 49:10)

Allah further defines this Brotherhood by explaining that Muslims are awliyyaa’ (allies, friends, supporters) of one another, and this again is based solely on Islam:

“The Believers, men and women, are protectors one of another: they enjoin the ma`roof (all of Islam), and forbid the munkar (all that is evil; kufr): they observe regular prayers, pay Zakat, and obey Allah and His Messenger. On them will Allah pour His mercy: for Allah is Exalted in power, Wise.” (The Holy Qur’an, 9:71)

Muhammad (Salla Allahu `alaihi wa sallam) indicated in several Ahadith on unity and brotherhood as we can see in his (saaws) Farewell Sermon (khuTbat ul-wadaa`):

“All mankind is from Adam and Eve, an Arab has no superiority over a non-Arab nor a non-Arab has any superiority over an Arab; also a white has no superiority over black nor a black has any superiority over white except by piety and good action. Learn that every Muslim is a brother to every Muslim and that the Muslims constitute one brotherhood.”

Other Ahadith further elaborate on the concept of unity and brotherhood:

"A Muslim is the brother of another Muslim. He does not oppress him, nor does he leave him at the mercy of others." (Sahih Muslim Book 032, Number 6219)

The Prophet said, "None of you will have faith till he wishes for his (Muslim) brother what he likes for himself." (Sahih Al-Bukhari Volume 1, Book 2, Number 12)

As the teachings of Islam clearly show us that Brotherhood and unity in Islam are based solely on the `Aqeedah of Islam (which is the foundation of Muslim belief). The Mu’minoon are believers to one another and this belief has nothing to do with race or any other type of invalid reason to unite but is rather a bond based on an ideological belief in Islam.
Taken from http://brothermahdi.tripod.com/unity.html


P.S. More pics in entry titled 'Stress?'

I would just like to share a hadith I learnt at madrasah last Sunday. Ustazah Aisha showed us a music video from youtube, but that Xifu guy's voice sucks in 'live'. It sounds better in the studio recorded version, but I dunno how to upload the song here without a link. So, just read the following la yeah? If you really wanna listen to the song, ask me personally. I can either send it to you through MSN or let you hear on my MP3 aite.

Abu Hurairah, radiyallahu 'anhu, reported that the Messenger of Allah, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, said:

"Do not be envious of one another; do not artificially inflate prices against one another; do not hate one another; do not shun one another; and do not undercut one another in business transactions; and be as fellow-brothers and servants of Allah.

A Muslim is the brother of a Muslim. He neither oppresses him nor humiliates him nor looks down upon him. Piety is here - and he pointed to his chest three times. It is evil enough for a Muslim to hold his brother Muslim in contempt. All things of a Muslim are inviolable for another Muslim: his blood, his property and his honour."

[Muslim]

taken from http://fortyhadith.iiu.edu.my/hadith35.htm

Laatahaasaduu, walaatanaajashuu, walaatabaaghadhuu, walaatadaabaruu, walaayabi' ba'dhukum a'laa baii' ba'dhin, wakuunuu i'baadAllahi ikhwaanaa. Almuslim akhulmuslim, laayazhlimuhu walaayakhdziluhu, walaayakdzibuhu, walaayahqiruh. Attaqwaa haahunaa. Wayushiiru ilaa sadrihi thalaatha marraat. Bihasbimriin minasysyar an yahqira akhahulmuslim, kullulmuslim a'lalmuslim haraam, damuhu wamaaluhu wai'rdhuhu.

"When you call yourself a muslim, a brother to another muslim. Don't you let him down, don't you bring him down, don't you dare to look down upon him." from Brotherhood by Muadz.