I just came back from my third driving practical. I think Kevin, my instructor is tired, and pretty much bored at how slow I learn... And I still can't keep straight in my lane... But at least I improved in putting to gear 2, I didn't put in the wrong gear again and also I pretty much got the hang of braking or clutching in first when approaching a red light behind a car. I shall improve on my gear change (1->2->3->2->1) next Monday, Kevin ask me to control it on my own already without having him to prompt. Gear change itself at least have 4 sub-points I need to remember. Hey so far so good, I've yet to mount a curb (close enough though) or stall the engine (hahah, whenever the car make weird sound, clutch in!) Whee~! Quite demoralised when he feedback at the end of the practical just now, but thinking about it, not bad leh, on my third lesson... And yep yep I shall read the notes I jotted down before next practical and try to improve my gear change.

I have another practical next week and 2 more on the last week of October. I plan to book for twice weekly in November, but December I don't think I can keep to that frequency due to exams, holiday and pesantren insyaAllah... I guess I'll go back to twice weekly (or more) in Jan and Feb. Hopefully I pass my FTT on 16th Dec and get to book a TP before my 22nd birthday! It'd be nice to pass before my 22nd birthday! :D And I shall work towards it. Semoga Allah merezekikanku untuk lulus...

Stress jugak arh pikir pasal S-course, crank-course, parallel parking, vertical parking, stop on slope, directional change and U-turn but insyaAllah boleh. By end of Feb, I should have covered about 30 practicals if I follow my plan. *gulps* I would have spent $2000 or more by then. I guess it's a worth-it investment but woah... $61 per lesson, I better make ch and every lesson worth the money...

Dear Kevin, please have patience with me and don't scold me, I don't wanna stop for the second time...

I cannot take it when I'm scolded...

Speaking of which I can't even take it hearing people being scolded. I don't have the heart for it. As in I'm talking about serious scolding ar... I hate arguments, I hate when people can't compromise and give and take a little, I hate it when people even start raising voice at each other. I get scared of the consequences... Anger brings people nowhere but bad consequences especially if people totally don't talk rationally and just shoot their mouth off or their hands start to move :(

Oh, actually I'm feeling pretty scared on the road, whether I'm driving, or I'm being driven or I'm a pedestrian. I haven't totally gotten over the second accident, and the nightmare I had just made things worst. I talked non-stop or went to sleep to distract myself and I just feel like pulling myself away from the door when my brother drove at a fast speed at the expressway last Saturday night.

I'm wondering how to survive these 4 months as I spend on driving, and I still have to pay for my madrasah fees, my hp bill, my basic necessities and daily expenses, my transport fare (which is like a freaking $4 everyday to and fro school!) apart from the amount I give my mum. I really cut down on my savings... Gotta go earn some bucks to cover up for the lost in savings...

There's so much I wanna talk about today! But sheesh I'd better START on my essay due tomorrow... And go book my practicals for November before it's too late!