Actually I'd been having great days since last Sunday (will say later)

But hmm... Adalah a few happenings which makes me sad. Like the passing of Junaidah's nenek yesterday (marilah kita sama2 sedekahkan Al-Fatihah padanya semoga rohnya di tempatkan di dalam golongan org yang dimuliakan ALLAH... sry Jun my mum tak kasi hadir tadi pagi...), and Ad's confession (thru K.Maryam) this afternoon and ya there's one more. People in my close surroundings are feeling down, mane boleh I'm not affected kan? Gakkan time happy je kita tompang happy, time sedih pon kita share sesama juga semoga bebanan (jika ada) yang dirasa lebih ringan dan mudah dipikul...

It's like a slap in the face... Apa tak nye, my mum had been nagging at me about it since I came back from my camp marathon. K.Maryam I'm going through the same thing as you sis... Though yours came from your bro in a joking manner. Mine was SERIOUSLY like a slap in the face.

I've been so busy with events/camps and running here and there and everywhere filling every single second of my life with planning for them sacrificing sleep and eat and all that I fail... in my responsibilities to those close to me. I have defiitely failed in my duties as a daughter for the past at least 4 months (since final planning stage for night cycling). And as a friend, I think I've failed for the past year at least. I truly wish to apologise to these people, but I'm too egoistic I suppose.

My school results too hadn't been 'cemerlang' lately... Padahal studying is an ibadah too. Speaking of ibadah, my solat hadn't been cemerlang either. And when was the last time I puasa sunat? Entah lah. Nama je pergi Kem Remaja Cemerlang (KRC) tapi tak cemerlang dalam aspek2 kehidupan langsung, apa dah.

We KRC participants attended a post-KRC gathering last Sunday night and we drafted out a 'Fityan ikrar' which Ust Irwan will compile. In the meantime, this is my ikrar for short-term:

Aku, sebagai seorang Muslimah yang ingin cemerlang di dunia dan di akhirat berikrar untuk
-tidak melewat-lewatkan waktu solat
-mengutamakan urusan di rumah sebelum urusan di luar
-rajin belajar dan mengulangkaji pelajaran untuk ujian DAN peperiksaan
-peka atas keadaan orang-orang di sekeliling
-membantu mereka yang memerlukan
-memberikan usaha 110% dalam apa jua urusan

Tak banyak, sikit je, 6 je inti ikrar, but I'm sure it'll be hard to carry it out. And therefore I ask for the help of my dear friends to support me and remind me of this ikrar at all times and to be patient with me if I get pissed off at you for reminding as well as to understand my situation.

To top it up... Ya Allah, yang Maha Berkuasa dan Maha Mendengar, berilah aku kekuatan untuk melawan nafsu yang boleh membawaku ke kerosakan kerana diri ini amat lemah sekali, selalu terdorong untuk melakukan kemunkaran...

I have reorganised my priority from:
1. Fityan Ghufran
2. Nur-Ikhwan
3. Kawan-kawan
4. Pelajaran: Biotech & DPIA
5. Pengurusan diri
6. Keluarga

to:
1. Pengurusan diri
2. Pelajaran & Keluarga
3. Kawan-kawan
4. Nur-Ikhwan
5. Fityan Ghufran
(with effect from tmr, I'm so tired today!)

My dear Fityanees, it's not that you won't see me around at all, but most likely I'll just be participants or tukang sebok. I won't be able to be part of the organising comittee for the upcoming events (most likely till around February or even as late as May next year). Gonna miss you guys... :'(

My dear NI-ans, I know I've accepted the responsbility entasked to me and NI should be at a high priority but I am not able to do that. I HAVE TO lessen ny commitments outside... But as in my ikrar, insyaAllah I'll give my 110% where possible.

My dear friend... Ad, sorry if I'd been too busy being everywhere that I couldn't be with you much as like in First Year. I do wish for myself to be as diligent in my studies and I will try to help you out wherever I can like how it was in First Year. Do not hesitate to ask for help when you need it. Yes I may sound frustrated sometimes (most of the times I guess) but insyaAllah I'll help. We'll start studying early k? Sett?

My dear friend... Siti, I know you don't read my blog but I wish to write it here anyways... Hey, so sorry to have to decline the past few meet-ups you suggested. I'm sry i hadn't been able to be with you lately to go visit the unis, to have your hair cut etc... InsyaAllah we'll meet up one of these days and chill together yes? Miss the sec school days so much, esp the times we'd sit together on bus 10 to catch the anime every morning on the way to school and sitting in the parade square listening to the ending on my hp radio...

Erm... Shall we go to the happy side of things now??

Oritez! Sunday afternoon, was soooooo glad DTalk went by smoothly and eventhough we forgot to take a pic as a whole together and I had to rush off halfway and I looked stressed (cos I had to rush off for an exam which I couldn't finish studying for and neither did I finish my tugasan2 uh no), deep inside I was feeling light and relieved and just glad that it's over!

Faraidh exam was do-able! Whohoo~ I might even score for it, insyaAllah ;) And.. I saw my results for last term: A- for Musthholah Hadith and A for Sejarah and Tamadun Islam! Ok, wish I had an A for Mustholah but hey, alhamdulillah seh! I thought I'd fail...

Post-KRC gathering was ok I guess. Ust, nak tengok video!!! Bila boleh siap? The session was spent on 'Langkah Bermula' to set our collective 'ikrar'.

Yesterday... LAST duty was heck. Had to clean 6 rabbit cages, eww~ But luckily erm... what's that guy's name? Nvm. He helped us transfer the rabbits and so a 40mins task was cut down to 10mins yay! Finally had to identify the mice numbers, total of 15 mice I think, aiyo~ so hard to identify in the end just hantam only larh!

BPT tut and lec, I slept through both, oh my... I was seriously sleepy la k... Missed out quite alot, erm oh well... This is like what, my 3rd or 4th time sleeping while teacher is talkingg THROUGHOUT MY LIFE. InsyaAllah it won't become a bad habit.

Received BPT term test paper back blergh! 29/50. Thought I'd fail... But after seeing how the rest of my class did (Thilini got 47/50 ok!) 29/50 is as good as a FAIL for me la ok...

Today... Cleaned abit of my room. Now I can sleep spread-eagled on my bed! No larh, I won't do that.. Then I kinda accidentally skipped TE lecture. My brainwaves still haywire, but hey I'm not the only one! Mr Cheung larh kept changing the timing. I honestly seriously thought it start at 1 instead of 12 -_- Ada hikmah tu, got to clean my room, and... Mr Cheung spent half his time talking 'crap' amidst his announcements according to Ad anyway. Oh got my TE paper back. Alhamdulillah not bad...

Dah tu je.

Sry masih malas nak update about my 3 camps... To get an insight, read K.Maryam's blog. We went through rouhly the same thing..

K back to CSAS zzzzzzzz....